Noah's Journey Home

2011-05-28T17:50:00.000-07:00

I wrote this essay several years ago for a Korean Adoptions newsletter, soon after Sam came home from Korea. It is dedicated to my dad...a veteran and my hero.

Home of the Free because of the Brave

To define patriotism is to describe a person’s love of their country and their willingness to sacrifice for it. Koreans and Americans are quite similar in their allegiance to their motherland. Korea has a long history of turmoil and oppression and amazingly during each period of unrest they have risen above adversity and become stronger. Koreans and Americans have a lot in common but one of the most profound commonalities is their patriotism.

As in America, Korea is rich in celebrations of significant days in history that made Korea the phenomenal country it is today. This summer, while we celebrate our independence, Koreans will set aside a day for citizens to remember those who died for their country, their Memorial Day which falls on June 6. They will celebrate Constitution Day on July 17 , the anniversary of the 1948 proclamation of the Constitution of the Republic of Korea. Finally, Liberation Day will be celebrated on August 15, recognizing the official surrender of Japan to Allied forces in 1945 ending the 35 year colonization of Korea by Japan. Korean’s will celebrate their patriotism this summer.

I look at my adopted son Sam and I am reminded of my dad. Not in the obvious physical sense but in the strong connection the two have to Korea. In 1949 my dad was drafted into the army and soon, after the Korean War broke out, on a ship setting sail for Incheon, Korea. He served two tours of duty as a forward air controller during the Korean War. In the two years he was in Korea he experienced severe frostbite during the battle of the Chosin Reservoir, was the sole survivor of his unit in a fierce battle that left him battered and alone for days behind enemy lines, and cautiously walked across a shattered bridge spanning the Han river to witness the complete and absolute destruction of Seoul.

On June 10, 2002...forty nine years to the day my dad departed from Korea for the last time I boarded a plane for Incheon, Korea to bring home his grandson, Sam. I expected the trip to be emotional...I was bringing home our baby...but I never expected the wave of emotions that consumed me as I stood on the same soil my father stood 49 years earlier fighting for the independence of the Korean citizens. There is a Korean War memorial wall at the War Memorial Museum in Seoul. Guests are invited to sign the wall. In the bottom right corner I inscribed, “Neil J. Murphy 1950-1952”. It is the only physical proof within the borders of Korea of my dad’s service; however, Sam is living proof that my dad and thousands of other Korean War Vets did not fight in vain.

My dad’s story is just one of thousands of stories of the Korean War. As each page of the calendar turns the heroes who tell these bold stories are passing and their stories are silenced. An inscription on the Korean War Veteran’s Memorial in Washington D.C. summarizes the reason why these veteran’s are called heroes.

“Our Nation Honors Her Sons and Daughters

Who Answered The Call

To Defend A Country

They Never Knew

And A People They Never Met.”

Have you ever thought for a moment about the long road it took for your adopted child to be placed in you arms? I am not talking about the piles of papers and running around in the adoption process. I am talking about the long history of adoption in Korea starting with Harry Holt’s incredible journey to adopt 8 orphans of the Korean War in 1954. The children we embrace today are a result of a conflict that happened over fifty years ago. The freedom my dad and thousands of other veterans from around the world fought five decades ago is the same freedom that has allowed our families to be formed through Korean adoption today. It is so very important for adoptive parents to understand the history of adoption in Korea. Our children are with us today because of a war fought long ago. Our adopted children are the living legacies of the Korean War Veterans.

When we adopt we are quick to thank the agency, the social workers, the mailman, even the lady behind the FedEx counter, but in your lifetime have you ever looked a Korean War Veteran in the eye and said “Thank You.” Maybe now is the time, before it is too late. This summer, if you are attending a patriotic event on or around the Fourth of July and you cross paths with a veteran of the Korean War shake his hand and say thank you. Let him know that he did not fight in vain. Introduce your son or daughter to him. Without his patriotism you would not have the child you love so dear today. Koreans and Americans fought side by side many years ago in a war that by some is defined as the “The Forgotten War”. As parents it is our duty not to forget the sacrifices made during this conflict. Our children are descendants of a proud and honorable nation and by fate have been adopted into an equally proud and honorable nation.

My dad never had the chance to hold Sam. Five days after I told him we were adopting from Korea he died of lung cancer. Ironically, one year later to the day I last spoke to my dad, a baby boy was born in a hospital in Seoul, South Korea. A baby boy who will grow up knowing his Papa was a hero and the true definition of a patriot.

A Granite Question Mark

2011-03-09T17:40:00.000-08:00

One suggestion I would have for any adoption agency advocating for an older child's adoption would be to issue to the adoptive parents a statue of a granite question mark, a very sharp chisel, and a sturdy mallet. On the day the statue is delivered...before your new child is home... that piece of rock is polished, smooth, and just about as perfect as perfect can be. That of course is also our ideal of who our future child will be... polished and just about as perfect as perfect can be.

So, once your child arrives you are allowed one powerful blow to the chisel on the granite for every unanswered question reveled in regards to your child's history. One blow...only one...regardless of how big or how infinitesimal that information is. Because, really, what good would taking twenty whacks to a piece of granite really accomplish or change? At first you'll be taking two, three, even ten whacks a day because that's just how it is the first several months. Their language is so primitive the only thing you will learn are his likes and dislikes, not a whole lot more.

Then things slow down and there may be days you won't even have the need to pick up the hammer. At this point the statue is looking a little dinged up, but still maintaining its integrity. Soon your child will begin to express himself through our spoken tongue. It isn't perfect but it is somewhat understandable. The hammer is once again in hand several times a day as memories surface and are spoken. Some are wonderful...some not so much. Chisel away. One blow...regardless of how big or how infinitesimal that memory is. Because, really, what good would taking twenty whacks to a piece of granite really accomplish or change?

Then things slow down again and the hammer collects a fine layer of dust. The statue is pushed aside, not so much a focal point anymore in your life or the life of the child. You are cruising through this parenting thing. You've got it down. Nothing but smoo.... wait! More memories surface. Significant memories that alter your perspective of what is just and what is unjust in an innocent child's life. You pull out the statue, grasp the chisel, clutch your hammer, and pull your arm back so far that the force of inertia when the hammer meets the chisel would break (you would think) the hardest of surfaces. Once the two meet a small ding the size of all the others appears. Regardless of how much force you landed on the statue, the damage was no more different in size than the one you landed two years ago when you found out he was left handed. You look at your statue...your question mark. It is damaged from reveled history. But for as much damage as has been inflicted on that question mark statue there are still parts that are polished, smooth, and just about as perfect as perfect can be...just like your adopted child.

History has damaged many of our children...some more than others. But the bottom line is that regardless of how many dings and divots history has created in our child, it is up to us as adoptive parents to find the polished, smooth, and just about as perfect as perfect can be in our child. It is our right, our duty, and our honor.

When Do We Dig Her Hole

2010-02-05T17:10:00.002-08:00

Every day since Noah has arrived in our family, life lessons have been presented to him. Some of these lessons are more subtle than others. This past week my sister-in-law passed away after a long battle with cancer. Her death was Noah's first experience with death since joining our family 18 months ago. I was very cautious entering into the conversation with Noah regarding death, as I had no idea what type of memories this aunt's passing might ignite. For the most part of the day of her funeral I carefully watched Noah and his reaction to her death.

Fran's funeral was Thursday. She had requested a full Catholic funeral mass, with all the symbolism attached. Prior to the service I directed his attention away from the open casket. During the actual service he sat somewhat bored...typical of his reaction to every Sunday at church as the funeral mass very closely followed the protocol of our everyday mass. When the priest waved the incense over the coffin Noah still had his eyes cast down to the floor. Soon the perfume of frankincense and myrrh spread across the church. Noah turned to me with his big brown eyes and smiled widely, "Ethiopia!" he said excitedly. Now his interest was peaked. He obviously had attended Orthodox funerals in Ethiopia. He stood on his toes to watch. After the priest returned to the altar Noah turned to me and asked,

"When do we go and dig her hole?"

When do we go and dig her hole? When do WE go and dig her hole?

That afternoon...in a small church on the Olympic Peninsula...under the veil of a somber moment Noah learned another life lesson. We do not have to dig holes. When it comes to facing the death of a loved one, the only job we have is that of embracing one another. Nothing more. Nothing less. Just embracing one another.

2010-02-02T14:49:00.000-08:00

A moment away from Noah...to reflect on his big brother's birthday 8 years ago....

As I write, it is the early morning hours of February 3rd in Seoul. I have always spent the day before my adopted sons birthdays with thoughts to honor the women who gave birth to them a world away. So today my thoughts are in Sam’s birth land. Eight years ago today a young woman began to feel the pains of labor somewhere in the crowded streets of Seoul. Eight years ago today a young woman was in her final hours of hiding from her family a pregnancy she did not expect or want. Eight years ago today, in Korea, Yoon Jae-Bum became and orphan as his birthmom walked away from her newborn son in a city hospital. Eight years ago today a hero was born in my heart.

Nearly 96% of unwed pregnant women in South Korea choose abortion according to their Ministry for Health, Welfare and Family Affairs. 96%!!

Many people ask, “How could a mother leave her own newborn baby?” I could never...ever...ask that question of Sam’s birthmother. She courageously chose to face social indignation for carrying a child in her womb as a single woman. She chose to be that 4%. She chose to carry our Sam Jae-Bum...the beautiful gift she gave our family...Eight years ago today.

Happy Birthday Sam Jae-Bum.

I'm Back

2010-01-19T13:58:00.000-08:00

A very sincere apology for being absent for so long from this site! The end of the year swept me away and I am finally feeling like I am back. So...here we are...Noah has been home for 16 months now and as much as I hate using the phrase, "It's like we have always had him," I have to say it is so very true. The newness of an addition to the family has worn off, the blessed honeymoon period over, and the pulling up the shirt sleeves and getting down to business as far as discipline and expectations has begun. Somedays it is heartbreaking and somedays I have to pinch myself because I am so incredibly blessed to be able to call this little man my son.

Noah is half way through is second grade year. Every day he comes home full of excitement and stories of his classroom. I had to laugh right before Christmas break when he hopped into the car already explaining himself before I read the note from his teacher. Apparently he was swinging his book bag a little too enthusiastically when his class was singing Happy Trails (which in itself is so cool that 16 months ago he could hardly mutter a word in English and now he is singing in his perfect pitch Who cares about the clouds when we're together? Just sing a song and bring the sunny weather anyway... ) and "loudly" getting their stuffed packed up at the end of the day. He "bonked" Lily in the head with his bag which sent her into a fit of tears. When I asked Noah why he "bonked" Lily with his book bag, a quickly defended his actions by saying she was being too loud and it reminded him of when he herded goats in Ethiopia. He needed to gain control of the situation. He then added that Lily should be lucky he didn't have a stick. I dare you...truly...I dare you to try not to hold back a laugh when you see that sweet face and those beautiful brown eyes evoking his goat herding memories from his life in Ethiopia. I had to step out of the car...HE thought I was cooling my jets. : >)

We are still assessing Noah as far as his cognitive ability. His older brother Zak was adopted from China at about the same age. The timelines of their lives before they came to our family are very similar. So much has to be weighed into brain development when the first 7 years of life are a mystery. For Zak we are fortunate he didn't miss a beat...and in truth is scary smart. For Noah, it seems like there might be some delays. We aren't ready to jump and panic yet, but are definitely monitoring some of his cognitive skills.

Noah's memories of Ethiopia still flood his thoughts. He is able to emotionally handle them better as time passes. This past week, with images of the earthquake in Haiti he had a very interesting memory. He is keenly aware of the countries surrounding Ethiopia. He has an uncle in Somalia. He is not partial to Sudanese because refugees of the unrest would wander into his village on numerous occasions. Noah was watching the news about the earthquake and turned to me, recalling an adventure his aunt and he took. He described traveling a long distance by car to the ocean. He said some of his family who had lived by the ocean had been washed away by a giant wave. He talked about massive destruction that looked a lot like the earthquake images on the screen. I Googled tsunamis in Somalia and sure enough...the big one that hit Thailand crossed the sea and hit the coast of Somalia. Noah would have been just a little over three years old. Of course I am a woman of perspective...and for one of my sons earliest memories to be witness to the aftermath of the deadliest tsunami on record...well...that memory kind of shadows my son Nick's Toy Story third birthday party.

One quick last note...the picture of Noah holding the cookie for Santa that looks like the ET flag...his sly look is hiding the small detail that he mixed a spoonful of bereber into the red frosting...so when Santa took a bite...around midnight...exhausted...and ready for bed...'he' was greeted with an explosion of Ethiopian spices in his mouth. God Bless berbere!!

Finally a moment to write...

2009-11-29T08:50:00.000-08:00

Where has the time gone. It's been over a month since I posted. I have to admit, it's for selfish reasons. A friend encouraged me to enter the National Novel Writing Month challenge, so for the past 29 days I have been pecking away at the keyboard to get to my 50,000 word goal. I passed it last week and am still about 1/3 way from the finish line of a complete novel. : >)

Noah is doing well. He is continuing to grow like a weed...has gained about 20 lbs since his arrival a little over a year ago. And yes...his feet are still growing as well. Fall was a year of not only physical growth for Noah but cognitive and emotional growth as well. He continues to move forward in his 2nd grade class. At this point Math seems to be his strongest subject. His command of the language is also mind blowing. He can express himself without any difficulty although at times we have to chuckle at his Noahisms. For instance, tonight Hannah is going to watch Sam and Noah while the rest of us work at the homeless overflow shelter in Vancouver. He can hardly wait for 'baby take care of me' with Hannah.

Translation: Baby Take Care of Me= babysit : >)

Noah has blended very well into our community. The excitement of a new student from Ethiopia has worn off across the board. That has been somewhat hard for Noah to adjust to the attention off of him so he has gone overboard at times to get some negative attention. We have had to come down hard on him with consequences. Another for instance...and in truth it is somewhat laughable...but...he just can't do this.

The hearing and audiologist came to the school to screen the kids for hearing and sight. I happened to walk into the office a few minutes after Noah had his testing done.

The school nurse came up to me and said, "Did you know Noah cannot hear or see well."

I laughed, "No...what do you mean?"

"He failed both...according to the results he is sight and hearing deficient."

"He hears fine at school in Mrs. Smith's class. He chooses NOT to listen to me at home but that's not because he is deaf. He seems fine around the house." Then I looked at the nurse and said, "He's playing you guys for attention."

She was left wondering what was up. I got caught up in life and forgot about the conversation.

Following week we get a letter in the mail from the Educational Service District informing us that our severely deaf and hearing impaired child needs further testing through a specialist provided to us through the ESD and we would need to call to make an appointment.

"NOAH," I called him into the room. I read the letter word for word, accentuating the words severely deaf and sight impaired . "What's this all about? Do you realize we have to take you in," and then I began to fib a wee bit, "and now you are going to need to have to get glasses that are strapped to your head with a rubber band AND you are going to have to have a little box screwed to your head, behind your ear, with a wire running into your ear so you can hear better."

He looked at me horrified.

"It's ok Noah...it will make you be able to see and hear better. It's what we have to do...for you."

He sat very silent and then looked to me with his big brown beautiful eyes. "Can't I just do the test again?"

"Why would you have to Noah...unless..."

"I want to take the test again," he insisted. "I lied."

"Why would you do that Noah?" I explained to him the chain of events, the extra work these adults had to go through to get to the point of the letter I held in my hands. "Why?"

"I wanted to see what would happen if I failed."

Logical for someone still trying to figure out this new world of his BUT not acceptable.

"Well...here's what would happend, " I told him. "You go to your room....and no video games for the long weekend. You wanted to know what would happen...well...here you go."

Noah likes to wear the sweat pants that swish when he walks. He quickly turned on a dime, knowing full well any form of argument would fall on my own self imposed deaf ears, and quickly swished to his room.

Clouds

2009-10-14T23:04:00.000-07:00

The other day I took Hannah, Noah, and Sam to the park. Hannah went for a run. Sam and Noah played on the playground. About 20 minutes into playing Noah came running over to me and pointed to the sky. Excitedly he raised his hands to a cloud and outlined its shape, explaining to me how it resembled a Great White Shark. After a few seconds I could see it...it was almost the perfect shape of the front end of an attacking Great White. Wow...we stood together watching as the Great White slowly dissolved into a mass of rain clouds. When it was completely blended Noah ran back to the playground to play with Sam. I watched him run away...thinking...wondering...did he have time to take note of the shapes of clouds in Ethiopia? If so, what did his imagination see. Not sharks, I am sure. A year ago he had no idea such a creature was a part of his world.

How many clouds passed over his head the first 6 years of his life in Ethiopia that took on shapes of things he had no idea existed nor could he imagine would be a part of his new world?

Did Great White Sharks appear in his Ethiopian sky?

Noah's Homecoming Anniversary

2009-09-28T13:49:00.000-07:00

We celebrated Noah's homecoming day this weekend. He has officially been ours for one year! Here are some pictures of the past few weeks. It's been busy between soccer and all of his siblings activities. He's also has learned about the lucrative business of a lemonade stand on a hot summer day. : >) We spent this past weekend at the beach...Noah had never seen the ocean before. He stood at the edge of the water, his arms spread wide, just chanting ETHIOPIA over and over. We aren't sure why. He is still so connected to where he came from yet so much a part of his new world in America.

Family

2009-09-11T10:32:00.000-07:00

Happy Ethiopian New Year!

This morning was the first time since school started that Sam, Noah and I were able to walk to school. Hannah caught a ride with a friend so the 'twins' and I had the calmness of a beautiful NW morning to stroll to 2nd grade.

I don't know what it is about these morning walks, but it seems that every time we have a chance to slow down and walk Noah opens up about his life in Ethiopia. Today's story, just as numbing as the ones before. It all started when Noah asked, "What if the man (judge for finalization) told you I could not be your son? Would I have had to go back to Ethiopia?" I told him, honestly, that they would try to find another family for him in the United States. Noah said he was glad the judge said he could be in our family. He loved his family in Ethiopia but he knows he cannot go back. He doesn't want to go back. Noah started talking about his family in Ethiopia. On a regular basis, he talks about his Aunt Genet. Noah said he never really slept well at Genet's. I asked if it was because of his baby cousin, Galiela.

"Not always, " he said.

"Then why didn't you sleep well?"

Then Noah spoke about what happened in Genet's shack soon before he was relinquished . A group of men came into the shack at night and grabbed Noah and took him away. He described having his hands tied behind his back with a "thick brown rope". The men told him he was going to be a part of their 'family' now. Noah said he fought and argued but they kept him tied up. They wanted him to join their 'family'. They were a patched together 'family' of thieves. They needed a little body to sneak in to other's homes and steal for the 'family'. This morning, when Noah spoke, he said he agree to join their family so he could be untied. When they released him he bolted back to Genet's house. The next night they came back and took Noah again. The blanket over the door frame rendered Genet and Noah defenseless. Once again Noah fought but in the end agreed and even stole a coin and brought it back to the men to prove himself, but still he had no intention of being a part of the family of thieves. He returned to Genet's. Genet alerted, what Noah described as, the local police. The third night the police waited outside Genet's shack and when the thieves returned to snatch Noah again they were "caught."

Noah said it wasn't long after that that he was taken to Kombulcha, to the orphanage.

Noah has experienced so many forms of family in his life thus far. For a very brief time he truly was a family with his Ethiopian mom and a dad. Tuburculosis ended it. His 'family' shifted to a single dad and son. Tuburculosis ended it. Then his family was a wonderful aunt, a baby cousin, and a nephew. Fear, hunger, and poverty ended it. He became a family with the other orphans at the WACAP House, who were all waiting for placement. My travel to Ethiopia ended it. Today his family is my family is our family. As we walked to school this morning I vowed again in my heart that Noah Musse is my son forever. Nothing will ever end it.

2009-09-04T13:19:00.000-07:00

   Noah, Teklu, Sam, Menywab and Megan at the WACAP picnic
   Teklu and Menywab spent the weekend with us
   Noah insisted on dressing up when we went up the gorge for brunch
   Finalization Day!!! Noah officially became a Barclay and our family was complete
   First day of school!! He was ready...and very excited to start 2nd grade.

What a month we have had! Noah has had a wonderful end of summer. Probably the highlight for Noah was the visit of Ato Teklu (ET country representative for WACAP), his second 'dad' after he was housed at WACAP House in Ethiopia. While Noah was waiting to come to our family Ato Teklu was an amazing comfort to Noah. Teklu was in the states on the invite of WACAP. He was able to see many of 'his' children who had been adopted. Also visiting was Ato Menywab, the director of Bete Hitsanat, the initial orphanage that housed Noah before he was moved to WACAP house. We offered to have both men stay at our house during part of their stay and were very pleased that WACAP said yes. We had a wonderful visit with lots of laughs with these wonderful men. More importantly, Noah re-connected with Ato Teklu. It was very special to see.

Noah's adoption was also finalized this past month. He is now 100% family. : >)

Finally...two days ago Noah started 2nd grade. His tutoring this summer helped him catch up to his classmates for the most part. We are confident he is going to have a wonderful year.

2009-08-12T19:25:00.000-07:00

The question is asked many times over, "How is Noah doing?" To be honest, at this point of the game Noah seems to be doing fantastic. Really. This summer, his first summer in America, has been full of a lot of adventures.

When I was in Ireland with my daughter, Noah and the rest of the men of the family took a road trip north to Seattle. They caught a Mariners game...something so foreign to Noah that according to Jeff the size and scope of Safeco Field blew Noah's socks off! Jeff said by the 5th inning he was dancing in the aisles and singing along with the rest of the fans. He really does live by the motto, "If you can't beat them...join them." After a night at grandma's in Seattle they headed down to the Great Wolf Lodge...and indoor waterpark that basically could be described as what a casino is to adults...the Great Wolf Lodge is to kids. Every day since then Noah has begged to go back. He has no fear so he was riding the biggest rides they have. One, my husband described to me, was like a giant toilet bowl. Imagine 4 bugs strapped to a leaf spinning down a toilet bowl vortex and that was Noah and his brothers on one of the raft rides there. Let's just say I am glad I was half a world away. : >) I wish I had pictures of the whole adventure but Jeff forgot the camera...I guess I should'nt be too mad though. At least he didn't forget to bring a kid. : >)

On the home front...Noah has been busy with tutoring and swim lessons. Noah is now reading at about a 1.8 grade level which basically is equal to his classmates. Phew...I am so so so very relieved that he has caught up in less than a year. He still has trouble transferring information because of the language but he really has made incredible gains over the past several months.

We have a pool at our house but have only allowed Noah in it with water wings. Since swim lessons started 2 weeks ago however, he has proven himself to be a very strong swimmer. So far removed from our spring break where he actually almost made the life guard at the hotel in Washington DC get wet!! He no longer looks like he is splashing in an Ethiopia water hole but is actually using the correct kicks and strokes. Check another thing off the list. : >)

Now and then Noah's behavior has a setback. We expect it so we are ready to lay down the law. Today he missed a play date with a friend as part of the consequence of some naughty behavior at swimming yesterday. It really hit home with him and the tears fell. As hard as it was I stuck by my guns...and I know for a fact he has learned his lesson. Friends and playdates are his LIFE!!

So...that's the lowdown on Noah. This weekend we are very very excited to welcome Mr. Ato Teklu to our home. He is the director of WACAP adoptions in Ethiopia. He is in America for a short visit. Noah is beyond excited and is counting down the days and hours until he can see his Teklu again. What a special man...I am excited for my family to meet him as well.

Duty calls...back to work.

Summertime!

2009-07-20T14:12:00.000-07:00

This is a shot of Noah doing one of his chores...watering the garden. He always forgets to take off his waterwings...

We have officially started our second month of summer vacation...so far so good. Noah has had some trouble with the lack of structure summer brings. I think he and I both crave the school year schedule. He's become a huge fan of the tv show Avitar...and that has been my bargaining chip when he is choosing make waves. Overall he's not a behavior problem...he just lacks the long term focus my other kids have so he is in constant motion moving from one thing to another. There's usually a trail of destruction in his wake as well. : >)

Now that the first part of vacation is over I can slow down and reflect on Noah...and his past 9 months with us. The physical changes are very obvious. He has grown 2 3/4 inches since he walked through our front door for the first time! He's also put on about 15 lbs. Needless to say, he is growing like a summer weed. We took him to the dentist and it appeared that his permanent teeth were having difficulty finding their way down because of the unusual spaces in his teeth. So with a quick trip to the orthodontist Noah got 'braces' or 'grills' : >) on just his two front teeth to pull them together and open up the spaces for his canines to drop down. It's made a huge difference his teeth are shaping up.

Noah's teacher has graciously offered to tutor Noah this summer. He goes to her house every day for 45 minutes of one-on-one. It has made such a huge difference and come fall he will be just about caught up with the rest of his classmates. We are so grateful to her. Noah is now reading solidly at a mid first grade level. He's making great gains all the way around.

The biggest test of Noah's summer so far has been my absence for 10 days when my daughter Hannah and I went to Ireland the first part of July. Since his placement with our family he has never had a day/night without me. He did great, although when I talked to him on the phone he would just say, "I'm sorry mom, I don't know, I just love you so much." Very sweet to hear. I am also very grateful that he had the ability to handle this adversity with very little problems. By the way...Ireland...WOW!! Very very fun!

Yesterday Noah went grocery shopping with me and I let him get some ice cream cones sans the ice cream as we had 5 gallons back at the house. The box showed the cones with dripping, delicious (or de-liss-shus as Noah would say) vanilla ice cream. So last night after dinner, Noah runs up to the house and gets the box of cones out of our pantry. He was very excited to share the ice cream cones with the family. He opened up the box, looked inside, and then had a very angry/puzzled look on his face. He looks up at the family and says, "Stupids...they forgot to put the ice cream on the cones." He hasn't quite figured out the magic of refrigeration...nor the need for it when it comes to frozen foods. : >)

He has spent many hours in our swimming pool. He doesn't fear water but he most certainly does not know how to swim. He said he swam in Ethiopia but the way he moves in water it would seem more realistic to think he splashed in a waterhole...or stream. Thank goodness for waterwings! Next week he starts his first official swim lessons. We will just have to see how that goes. : >)

Next month Noah will be reunited with a very special man from Ethiopia, Mr. Ato Teklu. He is traveling to the states and will be at the WACAP picnic. Noah can hardly wait and truth be told, neither can I. My entire family is anxious to meet this wonderful man Noah and I talk about almost every day.

This Friday is the one year anniversary of Noah's court date. The date he officially became ours. How fast time has flown. Never in my imagination could I have guessed how this little guy has changed our world. When you are in the waiting stages of adoptions you try to picture your life with that child. Now, a year later my thoughts of a year ago seem so minor compared to the "real" life with Noah.

We are blessed...we truly are.

A moment to reflect....

2009-06-26T18:40:00.000-07:00

A friend passed on a wonderful book to me recently, Guide My Feet by Marian Wright Edelman. It is a book of prayers and meditations on loving and working with children. This particular prayer caught my eye...it's by Ina J. Hughes.

A Prayer/Pledge of Responsibility for Children

We pray (accept responsibility) for children

who sneak popsicles before supper,

who erase holes in math workbooks,

who can never find their shoes.

And we pray (accept responsibility) for those

who stare at photographers from behind barbed wire,

who can't bound down the street in a new pair of sneakers,

who never "counted potatoes",

who are born in places we wouldn't be caught dead,

who never go to the circus,

who live in an X-rated world.

We pray (accept responsibility) for children

who bring us sticky kisses and fistfuls of dandelions,

who hug us in a hurry and forget their lunch money.

And we pray (accept responsibility) for those

who never get dessert,

who have no safe blanket to drag behind them,

who watch their parents watch them die,

who can't find any bread to steal,

who don't have have any rooms to clean up,

whose pictures aren't on anybody's dresser,

whose monsters are real.

We pray (accept responsibility) for children

who spend all their allowance before Tuesday,

who throw tantrums in the grocery store and pick at their food,

who like ghosts stories,

who shove dirty clothes under the bed, and never rinse out the tub,

who get visits from the tooth fairy,

who don't like to be kissed in front of the carpool,

who squirm in church or temple and scream in the phone,

whose tears we sometimes laugh at

and whose smiles can make us cry.

And we pray (accept responsibility) for those

whose nightmares come in the daytime,

who will eat anything,

who have never seen a dentist,

who aren't spoiled by anybody,

who go to bed hungry and cry themselves to sleep,

who live and move, but have no being.

We pray (accept responsibility) for children

who want to be carried

and for those who must,

for those we never give up on

and for those who don't get a second chance.

For those we smother...

and for those who will grab the hand of anybody kind enough to offer it.

Adapted from Ina J. Hughes

Coming down to the end...

2009-06-11T13:58:00.001-07:00

We are one week away from the end of the school year. What a year it has been!

Noah had his end of the year evaluation for ESL etc. He will still need at least another year of ESL (yeah...he needs it..Zak tested out after the first year and that kind of complicated things early on in his education) but in truth has made such great gains given where he was a year ago.

He, of course, started off in October neither reading or writing. Today he is reading and writing at both a first grade level...right where he needs to be! I also was presented with an amazing 'gift' this week from his teacher...she has offered to work with him every day this summer to keep the 'fire' lit in him. She more than likely will be looping as well, so he will be graced with her amazing teaching for another year! Also, one of his 5th grade tutors will be hired to continue her work with him as well. I truly feel blessed with the people surrounding Noah. His spirit has created such an amazing network of goodwill.

Today we had a Thank You party for his 5th grade tutor/mentors. I brought Doro Wot and injera and they feasted like honorary Ethiopians. Some liked it...some didn't. They all loved the brownies, however : >). Marian Wright Edelman has written a fantastic book, I Can Make A Difference, that we presented to each one of them. They truly did make a difference in Noah's life!

One way to choose...

2009-05-28T10:15:00.000-07:00

How many major decisions have you made based upon eeny meeny miny mo or Rock Paper Scissor? In your lifetime probably more than you can count. Today, when we were walking to school Noah told me about a time he had to use his own version to make a big decision in his life. Once again I have to add, every day I gain a new sense of perspective from him, and this morning was no different.

We started our walk as we usually do, chatting about bugs and how tall the field grass is or whether or not the boys should have brought a sweatshirt to keep away the morning chill. Today, Noah turned his backpack so he was wearing it on his front. He made a little pouch and smiled, saying “This is how I carried Galiela.” (Galiela is his baby cousin who was given up for adoption prior to Noah’s relinquishment. He still talks both his aunt and his baby cousin almost daily) He told me how he would carry her all over Desse, his home town. From sun up until sun down his aunt would go to the Teff fields to harvest the grain and Noah would be in charge of baby Galiela. Noah said their neighbor, Mrs. Wordos, would be home so Noah would check in with her throughout the day. Now and then Noah would carry Galiela out to the fields, in his front pack, to visit his aunt Genet. When he would have to leave and Genet had to get back to work Galiela would scream for her mommy, like any baby her age, any where in the world would do.

Sadly Noah’s time with Galiela was short lived. Genet had no way to feed the two extra mouths. One day she took Galiela to the orphanage where she relinquished her. Noah was devastate at the loss of his baby cousin. Through Noah’s recollections Galiela was adopted to a family in Spain.

Things didn’t get better for Noah and Genet. This morning Noah recalled a moment with Genet. Genet told Noah she could not take care of him anymore. She told Noah she had three choices for him as far as where he could go. America. Spain. Somalia. Noah has an uncle in Somalia and Genet considered sending him to live with the uncle. Here in front of 6 year old Noah were three options. America. Spain. Somalia.

This morning...with his fingers...Noah showed me how he became our son. He touched his pinky finger on his left hand and said, “America.” He touched his ring finger on his left hand and said, “Spain.” He touched his middle finger on his left hand and said, “Somalia.” He continued this through all ten fingers and whatever country he said when he touched his right pinky finger was his choice... “America.”

Happy Camper

2009-05-27T16:01:00.000-07:00

We took Noah camping this weekend. He did awesome...then again if you think about it he 'camped' for the first 6 years of his life. In fact...our 'roughing it' really doesn't compare to his every day existence in Desse. Regardless, Noah was the definition of "Happy Camper" over the long weekend. We took a short drive to Silver Falls State Park set in the Oregon Cascade Range. Noah's Godmother and her family, as well as another family, joined us. All in all our camping party was 17 people strong. Now that's a lot of mouths to feed.

What was really cool about the weekend was of the 11 children camping, 7 were adopted. 3 from China, 2 domestic, 1 Korea, and 1 Ethiopian. : >) They have their own special support group. Really a wonderful thing.

Noah's favorite part of the whole experience was riding his bike around the campground. He probably logged in about 30 miles in 2 days. He was exhausted Monday night when we put him in the bathtub.

Perspective and Happy Mother's Day

2009-05-06T14:25:00.000-07:00

My perspective has never been the same since I returned from Ethiopia 7 months ago.

I saw a lot. I heard a lot. I touched a lot. A lot touched me.

When the world started talking about swine flu last week I listened. But with all the hype my perspective kept winding its way back to Ethiopia. Why in our world would the deaths of 27 people in Mexico create a panic that would have hotels holding travelers hostage in Asia, citizens screaming to close our borders, jet planes changing their routes because a passenger has a cough, and schools shutting down because someone has a fever.

In the Sub-Sahara region of Africa, the soil from where my son comes from roughly 5,500 people die A DAY from AIDS. That's right, in ONE DAY. On the Ethiopian soil from where Noah walked one year ago ... 5 million children are orphaned... 1 million children are orphans living with the HIV/AIDS. On the African soil from where Noah's family still lives today almost 7,400 people are newly infected with HIV A DAY.

Imagine living with those numbers day to day. So I ask a question...what if Ethiopia or Uganda or Zambia were our neighbors to the south...neighbors knocking on our door for help. Would the world notice?

Here's a little something I found this week. Some bullet points from the Federal Ministry of Health in Addis Ababa for the past week while we have been washing our hands with Purell.

Given the late start of belg and the approaching hunger season (yes, their ministry has a name for the time of year when famine could strike) food security and nutrition conditions may deteriorate rapidly in some parts of the country.
Since the beginning of April admission rates of malnourished children have increased rapidly and are alarmingly high in some areas.
Over 1000 children have been admitted to health care centers in one weeks time due to malnutrition.
The average price of cereals is still high and the price of livestock is increasing. No rainfall from belg producing areas so prospect of belg harvest is not promising due to inadequate land preparation and late planting due to erratic nature of the rain.
26 deaths have been reported due to Acute Watery Diarrhea last week. Due to lack of proper drugs, poor water supplies, poor hygiene and sanitation, and inadequate human resources they only expect these numbers to grow.

Oh, and one more thing....

No reports of Influenza H1N1 (swine flu) Phew!!

You see...Perspective.

May 7 is World AIDS ORPHANS Day. May 10 is Mother's Day. May 12 is the one year anniversary of Noah's relinquishment...the day he said good-bye to the only world he knew and started his transition into our world. Mother's Day is bookended by two very sobering reminders of life outside my walls.

A friend of mine adopted an HIV+ child from Ethiopia. We met in Addis last September and spent a week together with our new children. It was the AHOPE orphanage that Melat was in that left such a strong imprint on my mind. This month Jessica was honored by having an essay about adopting an HIV+ child published in Seattle's Child Magazine. Within the article there are some great ideas for Mother's Day gifts that Support AIDS orphans. I would highly recommend checking the article and the ideas out.

Seattle's Child Magazine: A Mother’s Essay: Adopting a Daughter with HIV

So let's see...for Mother's Day this year I think I'm going to ask for a bowl of peppermint candy ice cream and some micro-roasted coffee that will help support AHOPE.

Happy Mother's Day

Running

2009-04-21T09:59:00.000-07:00

Today Noah ran to school. Another beautiful morning in the Pacific Northwest. When the sun comes out, regardless of the temperature, we are outside seizing the moment. This morning Noah, Sam and I ran (ok... Sam and I walked briskly...Sam doesn't run unless there's a reward at the other end of the finish line) to school. I would tell Noah to run ahead to a cluster of mailboxes and then run back to me. When he caught me I'd tell him what to run to next. To the stop sign and then back to me. To the crossing guard and then back to me. Noah ran twice the distance Sam and I walked. This helps Noah settle into a day of learning at school.

Every morning I spend between 45 minutes to an hour getting Noah settled into his routine of the day. It frees up his teacher to be with her class and it also gives Noah a jumpstart to what is ahead for the day. Most days 30 minutes of this time I monitor his tutors who work 1 0n 1 with him. All of this takes place in a private room off of the main classroom. Today his tutor couldn't make it so I had Noah ALL to myself.

I'm not exactly sure how the topic came up but we got on the topic of his dad. More specifically his dad's death. According to the records his dad died 2 or so years ago from TB. I asked him if he remembered that day. When he began to talk about it his teacher came in, for a general question, but soon was sitting down next to me while Noah spoke. She has become his second mom, and her interest is as invested as my own.

Noah was in school on the day his dad died. He said his Aunt Genet (he calls her Gunny) came to his school and quickly pulled him out, telling him his dad was dying. They must run. He said they had no car so he and Gunnie had to sprint to the hospital through the streets of Desse. By the time they got to the hospital it was too late. His dad was dead. He was too scared to see his father's body. For several seconds Noah sat silent with his teacher and myself. I reached over to touch Noah's hand and said, "We will never forget your dad. I have his full name and we will talk about him whenever you want." Then I said, "I bet your dad was a handsome man." He looked at me somewhat puzzled. I asked, "Do you know what handsome means?" He gave me a sly cock-eyed grin and answered, "Awesome face." Absolutely 100% correct. : >) I told him his dad had to be handsome because he (Noah) was so handsome. Noah grinned from ear to ear.

I love to watch Noah run. His perfect form, his long legs, the smile on his face. Noah was literally born to run. So many times he asks to be dropped off at our mailbox (which is 1/4 mile from our house). I let him out and he starts his run. After I get the mail I take off down the road and soon am driving right beside him, my window down cheering him on. He glances across his shoulder at me and smiles with his entire face. More times than not when I am Noah's 'support vehicle driver' I flash back to my time in Ethiopia. Driving the dirt road into Debre Lebanos and the children running....begging by the side of the car. Driving into the weavers market and the children running...begging by the side of the car. Driving up to Mt. Entoto and the children running...begging by the side of the car. Noah HAS run...begged by the side of a car in Ethiopia.

On this beautiful Northwest morning Noah ran. He didn't have to run a race to beg for his survival. He didn't have to run a race to beat the last breath of his father. Today he ran for no other reason other than because he could.

2009-04-17T10:21:00.000-07:00

I've come to the realization that Spring Vacation is not a vacation to rest up from what has already occurred but more so it is a rest up before life becomes almost too crazy to control. We hit the ground running April 6 and have not stopped. Keep in mind Noah is only one of 5 children in the house. : >)

Here's the lowdown. We decided that Noah has been doing pretty good with school and the family so we extended his life experiences and put him on a baseball team this spring. Noah's a RiverDog (whatever that is). He's got a great arm, he's fast, and in Ethiopia he use to bat rocks with a stick...so the hand/eye coordination is there as well.

Three games down and he's held his own. Ok...so he's had to be told to hush up the "goat call" when he's bored on the bench (it's an amazing sound he used to call his goats in ET, it gets quite the rise out of his bench warming buddies and soon the entire bench is trying to call goats instead of cheering on the team..this would be ok if we lived in the city but we are country folk and there are goats within earshot of the ball field...Ha ha...imagine if the real things escaped their fences and came to the ball field...a horror movie in the making...then again Noah would probably grab a bat, call the goats and get them back into their pen before dialing 911 was complete!)

What is more gratifying than anything to Jeff and I is how Noah has been included by everyone. When he got his first hit this past Saturday the entire crowd stood up and cheered for him. They know his story and are blown away that 1 year ago he WAS herding goats in Dessie, Ethiopia AND hitting rocks with sticks. Now, here he is in America playing America's game.

We also celebrated Easter this past Sunday. Noah understood Easter from his Orthodox teachings in Ethiopia. Once again however, we Americans had to confuse his world by throwing in a giant furry bunny hoping around the country delivering eggs to children. For one thing he informed us that bunnies do not lay eggs and it should be a giant chicken instead. Second, why does the bunny put 'gross' stuff like candy inside and egg when the real stuff inside a real egg is so much more 'delis-shious' than candy. Spoken like a true survivor of his hungry world in Ethiopia Also a reminder to us that so much of our traditions are just routine mindless excess. : >) He's got a point on both topics. I don't think he believes in the Easter Bunny...or Easter Chicken. He believes in just the facts.

"Hobaba's House"

2009-04-06T13:13:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile since I last posted.

Last week was our spring break so we flew out to our nations capital for a week. Even before Noah came to the United States he was fascinated by Barak Obama. He knew Obama's face and everytime he would see news of him (on Aljazzera TV while staying at the guest house) he would jump up and excitedly cheer... "Go Hobaba". On the night Obama was elected president Noah watch with great excitement...the Ethiopian/African passion had carried over from the streets of Addis Ababa to our family room. He did not want to go to bed and although he didn't understand a word of Obama's acceptance speech he refused to go to bed until Obama spoke his last word.

On the evening of November 5th (day after the election) when we were settling down to watch tv as a family he asked if we could watch the "Hobaba Show" again. He thought the pomp and pageantry of the night prior was an everyday occasion in America. : >) It was then we thought we should think about a trip to DC. All of our kids are at the age where this would be an exciting and educational trip. I have to say...it truly was a fun, tiring , educational, unforgettable week.

The weeks prior to our leaving we prepped Noah with what was ahead. We said we were going to see "Hobaba's House" far far away. We said we would stay in a place where he could swim in a swimming pool. Somewhere along the way he fused those two together so he was telling everyone that he was going to swim at "Hobaba's House". We figured we'd just cross his disappointment of that not being a reality when we got to DC. Fortunately our president was on his way out the door to Europe so we just had to tell Noah "Hobaba" wasn't home. He accepted it with a shrug and said, "Next time."

So we did DC last week. We walked many miles every day. Saw amazing museums, rode bikes around the tidal basin to the Jefferson Memorial while cherry tree pedals rained down on us, looked Abraham Lincoln in the eyes at his memorial, honored my dad at the Korean War Memorial, became experts on the Metro system, watched a Panda eat bamboo, had a snack on the Capitol steps, climbed a tree by the Washington Monument, road tripped to Gettysburg, had dinner at the Hard Rock cafe, saw Hobaba's House.

This was Noah's first family vacation and what a vacation it was! Not sure how we can top this.

A New Phase of our lives...

2009-03-24T21:48:00.000-07:00

When our son Zak was learning the English language he kept us giggling with what we have come to affectionately term as Zakisms. Now that Noah's language is coming on full force we are now entering a whole new generations of 'isms.' I'm so excited to announce that we are now welcoming Noahisms into our lives. For example, today Noah was reading to his 5th grade buddy Haley. He was looking at the pictures to help him connect with the words. He got to a picture of a pig and her piglets. When he got to the word piglet he was able to figure out the first half of the word. "P-I-G". Slowly, to himself, he sounded out the letters. Proudly he looked up to us and was ready to say the entire word. Haley and I were ready for it...ready to cheer on his success. He looked at us with his big brown eyes and smiled ready for us to cheer on his sentence in full. "Big pigs have little pigs. Little pigs are called...P-IGGLOOS." Usually Haley and I can hold in our "that is so cute" surprised smiles or we can correct him with a sly endearing smile but we just couldn't today. We just busted up laughing...it was just so darn cute. He so believed himself that he was right and that baby pigs were called pigloos. : >)

One

2009-03-12T13:16:00.000-07:00

I am a huge U2 fan...have been one forever. U2 was introduced to me by my brother Tim , a musician, back in my high school years. Tim had a wanderlust spirit and in his late teens and early 20's chose to live a lifestyle as such. He traveled to the east coast on a few occasions with his band and would come back with fantastic stories of life on the road. One such story from the early '80s is the time he came back from Chicago and told me, "Do not forget this group or this name...these guys are going to be BIG." He told me about how he and his band hung out with this band from Ireland after one of their gigs. The lead singer's name...Bono. The band...U2.

So how does this tie in with Noah you ask...just wait.

Fast forward to the year 2000. New neighbors moved in. Wonderful kind people originally from Ireland. As time went on the mom of the family, Melissa, and I became fantastic friends. She too was a fan of U2...but for a different reason. Melissa grew up outside of Dublin. She was very much into the arts and theatre of her school. Going to that very same secondary school was a young man named Paul Hewson...Bono. Melissa was in a play with Paul and even had the original playbill and a photograph of the cast. Oh, and she would ride the bus with U2 bassist Adam Clayton.

So...how does this tie in with Noah you ask...just wait.

While we were preparing for our adoption through Ethiopia we were introduced to the beautiful words of Bono through the book On the Move. His words, based upon his 2006 speech to the National Prayer Breakfast where he spoke to leaders of all the faiths, are inspiring and powerful. The images are photos he took himself while visiting Ethiopia in the mid '90s. The boy on the cover errily looks like our son Noah. It is one book we should all possess and read in our lifetime. In Bono's own words:

"The one thing, on which we can all agree, is that God is with the vulnerable and poor. God is in the slums and in the cardboard boxes where the poor play house. God is in the debris of wasted opportunity and lives, and God is with us if we are with them. 6,500 Africans are still dying every day of a preventable, treatable disease, for lack of drugs we can buy at any drug store. This is not about charity, this is about Justice and Equality." --Bono

His words and his images kept us sane during the long wait for Noah.

And now I bring you to the connection with Noah. The ringtone on my cell phone plays U2's Pride when a call comes through. It is a song that Noah has become accustom to and he hums it regularly. When we started getting our bedtime routines down after Noah's arrival, Noah would pay attention to what Sam would do to settle in for the night. The one thing that stood out to Noah is that every night Sam would listen to music when he fell asleep. Sam's choice of music...The Beatles. Noah wanted music as well and when I asked him what type he would want the only song he could come up with... because it was so familiar was...Pride (In the name of Love). Every night Noah's sweet sweet voice sings from down the hall...

One man come in the name of love

One man come and go
One come he to justify
One man to overthrow

In the name of love
What more in the name of love
In the name of love

What more in the name of love

Full circle...I was told 25 years ago to remember a band's name. Could I have guessed then how much that band would intertwine in my life to the point of having our house serenaded every night to the melodies of U2 by my beautiful Ethiopian son.

2009-03-09T13:49:00.000-07:00

Since I've been so busy raising kids the past 15 years I put my journalism and education background on hold. Just recently I have begun to delve back into my past careers. My dear friend Jessica has helped encourage me to start writing again and I am preparing to enter back into the schools...not sure at what capacity but am excited to get back to two things I dearly love to do. My first nationally published piece is featured in this months Adoptive Families Magazine. For me it is a dream come true. I can't post the actual article from the magazine because of copyright so you'll just have to go out and purchase it. : >)

Letters to home...from home.

2009-03-02T14:21:00.000-08:00

Noah has been working on a letter to send to Ato Teklu, a wonderful man who works for WACAP in Ethiopia. It is being hand delivered within the week. After Noah was relinquished by his aunt he was placed in an orphanage. Mr. Teklu, knowing we were requesting to adopt a child around Noah's age, is the man who traveled to that orphanage and found Noah. His relationship with Noah did not end there. Once Noah was moved to the WACAP transition home Teklu became a central figure in his life for the three months leading up to my travel to bring him home. When I was in Addis I got to know Teklu very well. He is a wonderful man who loved my son when we physically could not. One of the most dynamic moments of our time in Addis happened during our final few hours on Ethiopian soil. Teklu and his driver took us to the airport around 7:30 pm. It was a very bitter sweet goodbye and I don’t think Noah really understood that this was really goodbye until we were at the ticket counter and tears just began to stream down his face as he cried for Teklu. He realized that the wonderful kind Ato Teklu would no longer be on this adoption journey with him. It was a sad realization for all of us.

This weekend Noah dictated a letter to Hannah who typed it on the computer. She printed it off and gave it back to Noah to write in his own handwriting. He signed it...Musse. "Because Noah is my American name and Musse is my Ethiopian name."

We are so very grateful to Ato Teklu. He is our Ethiopian angel.

Goat...the new white meat

2009-02-25T22:29:00.000-08:00

This morning as I was driving the boys to school I overheard a conversation between Noah and Sam.

"Sam, you would like eating goat."

"Goat?"

"Yes goat. You would like eating goat"

"How do you eat a goat?"

"Easy. Take knife and cut head off. Some parts garbage. Some parts good food. Cook in fire with water, tomato, and bereber. It delisishus."

"..............................."

Sam was speechless. : >)

*photo is of Noah and a goat on top of Mt. Entoto, Ethiopia 9/19/08

2009-02-24T09:39:00.000-08:00

Over the past several weeks we have noticed such wonderful progress in Noah's school work. If you had asked us a month ago if we would consider having Noah repeat first grade next school year we would have definitely leaned toward yes. Now I am confident he is moving in the direction he needs to go to go on to second grade next fall. I have to put all the credit in the hands of Mrs. Smith, his teacher and 5 amazing fifth grade mentor/tutors who have guided Noah over the past 4 months.

When I traveled to Ethiopia I brought my friend Cindy with me while Jeff stayed home with the other 4 kids. Cindy teaches 5th grade at the school Noah attends. When we arrived back in the states it was apparent Noah was ready to start school. He landed in America on September 26 and was in school by October 6. In the back of Cindy's mind she had been coming up with a possible plan with her 5th grade students to engage them in Noah's story. It could be a learning experience all the way around. She discussed a plan with Noah's 1st grade teacher of perhaps having some of the 5th grade students come over at set times during the day to work one-on -one with Noah. They created a schedule that would work with both classrooms. Cindy then asked her kids how many would be interested in being a mentor/tutor for Noah. Out of a class of 25 students 22 raised their hands. The final five tutors were selected through an application process and a contract was signed by both student and parent. Everyone understood the importance of this opportunity.

Almost 4 months have gone by since this began and I cannot begin to tell you the leaps and bounds Noah has made because of these 5 kids. He not only is learning academics, but he is also learning social skills and just how to communicate and be an American kid. He has also taught these kids a lesson or two on taking what life gives you and making the best of it. They know he came to our family with nothing but the clothes on his back. They know of his hardships. They have learned that succeeding is not about dwelling on the past but dealing with what is here and now. Noah's story has also come home to the dinner tables of the students helping and it has made a difference in their families life as well. I have spoken with a couple of parents of the 5th graders and they have said the experience has been invaluable for their child. Last week we were at a basketball game for my son Nick and one of the parents came up and introduced himself to Noah and I. He said this experience has changed his sons life.

Our local paper is doing a story about this amazing group of 5th graders. Two weeks ago a photographer and reporter spent several hours with Noah and the kids. Their story will be featured within the next week.

Through these wonderful kids Noah has learned how to count to 100 by 1's, 5's, and 10's, read books, socially interact, write stories, create story boards... to succeed in school. They are doing this not for the recognition, accolades, or grade but for the chance to say, "I made a difference in someones life." As an outside observer, and Noah's mom, I have to agree. They have made a big difference in Noah's life.

Presidents Day

2009-02-16T08:08:00.000-08:00

Happy Presidents Day! Yesterday Jeff was explaining to Noah that this was a three day weekend. He would have Monday off from school...we were celebrating two great American men who were our presidents...a very important day etc. etc. etc. Noah appeared to be listening quite attentively but Jeff soon realized he wasn't because when the explanation was complete Noah looked at him and asked, "Presents Day...more presents for Noah!" I'm sure he was thinking the entire time Jeff was talking, "America...you gotta love this place!"

For Noah's first Presidents Day we are going to go on a nice long bike ride beside the Columbia River. It's going to be a beautiful sunny day and he loves riding his bike more than anything in the world right now.

A trip to the zoo

2009-02-14T09:48:00.000-08:00

Noah had his first trip to the zoo not long ago. He was quite apprehensive to say the least when we told him we were going . In his mind he had conjured up the notion that the zoo had wild animals walking around. He was worried we would turn a corner and run into a lion. It took a lot of convincing to make him believe the zoo was a safe and fun place. I think what I loved the most about the trip was that he could care less about the things my kids go wild over and he went crazy over the animals my kids see, experience, and take for granted in the Pacific Northwest. For instance...we live very close to the Oregon coast. My kids have grown up visiting family who live on the Pacific Ocean. Sea lions, otter, star fish, and other marine wildlife are just kind of ho hum to them. But when Noah entered the underground viewing area for the sea lions he just about jumped out of his coat with excitement. The sea lions were performing for us...so they would swim right up to the glass and rub against the window. This absolutely excited Noah to no means. He could have sat their all day...but it was only the first stop of the afternoon. We had a lot more to see. We walked a little farther down the zoo path to the primate exhibit. The group of little boys I took with me for the afternoon were beyond excited...mimicking the monkeys...walking around like baboons etc. Noah just stood in his place, on the verge of a yawn. He saw monkeys in Ethiopia all the time. He had a band of baboons come into his shack and tear it apart. He says his aunt beat them off with a stick. Crazy how this world is. An American kid's excitement is an Ethiopian kid's tormentor. Noah just couldn't understand how come all the boys loved those monkeys because they are nothing but trouble where he came from.

February 11, 2009

2009-02-12T13:30:00.001-08:00

All is well around the house. Sam just finished getting over the flu...now I am just waiting for the next victim to succumb. I made it to the store today to stock up...just in case I am house bound with the plague for another 6 days when the next Barclay drops. : >)

While Sam’s been under the weather Noah has had to make it through his school days without his brother. He was very anxious to have to go through his school day “alone”. I hadn’t realized how much Noah relied on Sam for ‘safety’ until Sam wasn’t able to be there for him and Noah voiced his anxiousness of having to go it alone at school. He did fine. On Monday morning I broke the news to Noah that Sam had to be home again. He muttered something like, “Noah work, Sam work...too much.” But I didn’t really get what he was saying. That afternoon Noah came home very determined and sat down at the counter with homework. He had several letters cut out, one of them being the vowel “0” that is colored yellow. His homework, he explained, was to create words, “two letter words, three letter words” with those letters. So together Noah and I create words, “to, do, so, hop, mop, lop, bop” and so on. We came up with at least 10 words. He was very proud of himself as he wrote the words down. When the homework was completed I told him to write his name at the top of the paper. He wrote, “Sam”. I said, “Noah...you need to write YOUR name.” He said, “No mom, Noah does Sam’s work...Sam too sick...Noah do Sam’s work....Noah do Noah’s work....too much!” and then he smacked his forehead with palm and sighed. What a big big heart. : >)

January 26, 2009

2009-02-12T13:29:00.001-08:00

Happy Chinese New Year! Happy Korean New Year!

We had quite a weekend criss-crossing Portland celebrating Zak and Sam’s New Year’s celebration. Most folks don’t know that Asian countries like Vietnam, Korea, and China all base their New Year celebrations off the Lunar calendar. It is not a set date from year to year but instead based off of the cycle of the moon and typically falls toward the end of January.

Noah was very excited to take part in his brother’s New Years celebrations but became disappointed when we arrived at Sol Nol (Korean New Year) pulling into our parking space. He looked out the van window, blinking through the ray of sunlight filtering through the dirty glass to a fog filled empty playground, and asked, after the 45 minute drive,

“Is this Korea?”

“No Noah, this the Central Church in Beaverton.”

“No Korea...no....?” , and then a sigh.

So he thought he was going to Korea. (note to self...tomorrow when we celebrate Chinese New Years spell it out to him...we are going to CELEBRATE China....NOT travel TO China.) He bucked up and gorged himself with rice, mandoo, and Bulgogi and announced that if he ever DOES make it to Korea he will LOVE it because he likes the food.

January 23, 2009

2009-02-12T13:24:00.000-08:00

The image of Barak Obama privately being sworn in again by the Chief Justice after a miscue at the inauguration the day before was on TV last night. Both man's right hands were raised for the swearing in. Noah walke

d by the screen and in a very matter of fact and distinctly clear sentence he said, “Oh yeah....High Five Hobaba!”.

I guess he knows what a “high five” is...now he just has to get the name Obama figured out. Whenever he says Hobaba...the entire family collectively corrects him,“Obama...Noah...It’s Obama...Not Hobaba!” When he does eventually get it, I think we will all still refer to the 44th president of the United States as President Hobaba.

January 15, 2009

2009-02-12T13:23:00.000-08:00

Barack Obama has been elected the first African-American president of the United States of America. As a mom of a recently adopted son from Ethiopia I celebrate this important piece of history but I also have to pose the question,

“Do you think Martin Luther King’s dream came true?”

My job description as Noah’s mom changed yesterday. In a brief exchange he had with a student on campus my title changed from guiding this happy go lucky little man into the ways of American living into his protector... his champion.

We were leaving the school when Noah called out to a familiar face walking about 20 feet in front of us. Noah yelled “Hello ______”. No answer. Noah called again, “Hello _____”. Still no answer. Once more time, Noah yelled, “Hello ______”. The little boy turned around and said, “Why should I say hi to you, African.”

Of course I was stunned and shocked. I couldn’t believe what I had heard. Immediately I sped up my steps to walk stride for stride with the boy who was walking with his older sister. I asked the sister if she had heard what her brother had said. She said no. She asked him. He said he couldn't remember. I repeated what I had heard. “Why should I say hi to you , African?” He clammed up. She asked him again. He again claimed he could not remember. The sister was clearly upset with her brother and regardless of whether she heard it or not she made him apologize.

On my way down to pick up my other children from the middle school I called Noah’s school, somewhat taken back at what I should really do. What was my role? I gave them the facts of what just happened. Before I got back into the house after picking up everyone the phone was ringing. It was the school. The boy’s sister was extremely upset over what her brother had said and was in tears when she got home. His mom called the school to get my phone number so we could talk. The school would not give out my number to her but she gave permission for them to give me her number. I called her. She was very apologetic, very remorseful for what her son had said. “Why should I say hi to you, African?” I accepted her apology.

The following morning his teacher gave the child a stern talking to as well as he had a private conversation with the school counselor. My guess is he is in the process of ‘getting it’ now. As for Noah, although his language is still lacking in the understanding of every word spoken to him, he did understand the tone of the child’s voice as being negative. He also understood that along with that negative tone he heard the word African. However, instead of harboring angry feelings toward the boy, Noah drew him a picture of a flower and a rainbow and dictated to the school counselor three simple words, “I forgive you.”

So I pose the question again, “Do you think Martin Luther King’s dream came true?” Perhaps on the political stage where the world is watching...yes. For a child from Ethiopia who up until last week had never even heard of Martin Luther King Jr. but innately walks the walk that MKL embraced 40 years ago…yes. But at the level my African son has to walk every day of his life...that is yet to be determined.

Timkat January 13, 2009

2009-02-12T13:22:00.000-08:00

In the back of our minds we have been hoping to baptize Noah sooner than later. Jeff’s best friend from Kindergarden through adult hood is a Catholic priest in Seattle. He married Jeff and I, blessed our house after it was built 10 years ago, and he has baptized each of our kids. When we contacted him about Noah’s baptism he said the best date for him would be January 11. Looking at our calendar we realized how perfect a date that would. This week in Noah’s homeland the Ethiopian Orthodox Church is celebrating the holiday Timkat. Timkat honors the baptism of Jesus. This event is considered to be the most important holiday on the Ethiopian calendar. Noah was raised Orthodox Christian. He knows the story of Jesus. He knows Timkat. How wonderful that his Ethiopian faith world and his American faith world would come together for a very special afternoon.

When it came time to pick out what Noah should wear he and I opened up his closet on a quest...my quest was a bit different than his. When I told him we were picking out a nice outfit to wear I was focusing on black slacks and a white button-up shirt. Noah immediately focused on the formal dressing outfit I bought him in Addis. He pulled it out of the closet and asked in a hopeful voice, “Can I wear this?” It was perfect. It was symbolic. It was Noah.

The ceremony was special and Noah understood what was going on. He may not be able to express himself but he seemed to be familiar with the concept of baptisms. In all it was a wonderful afternoon. I have posted pictures on the Album page.

And now on to the real news of the weekend...Noah lost a tooth.

Saturday evening Noah and Nick were wrestling and one of his baby teeth got knocked loose. Oh dear...you'd think he was getting another round of immunizations. The screaming...yikes. Hannah and I whisk him down to the bathroom to asses the damage. It was loose, it was bleeding, he was wailing. All the boys were huddled in the bathroom to assist anyway they could...which really was no help at all because the bigger the audience the louder the wails. I kicked the boys out and locked the door. I could hear their worried whispering between breaths of Noah's moaning. (Yeah, you can say Oh Brother about now because the drama king was in da house) I told Hannah to sit criss-cross on the floor and have Noah lay his head on her lap so I could get a good look at the damage. So there we were...Hannah holding Noah on the floor while I took a look. I reached in to his mouth grabbed that tooth and ...'pluck'... in a very brief half second yanked that tooth out of his mouth. Then the screams again...OY. You'd think he had given birth and the after birth was on its way. I took the tooth in my hand, unlocked the door and was met by 3 very worried brothers on the other side. I proudly presented the tooth to them, exclaiming..."It's a boy," As quickly as I opened the door I shut and locked the door and tended to Noah once more. Sam, Nick, and Zak were busting up on the other side of the door. Noah finally calmed down enough (after Hannah and I explained the concept of the tooth fairy and she probably would be not come anywhere near our house because he was screaming so loud.) to come out of the bathroom to display the bloody hole where his tooth once occupied. Cheers erupted from this brothers and dad. When I exchanged the tooth for $1 that night while Noah was sleeping I took a long look at that tooth. I saved it. Why you ask...well...when you are a mom you celebrate every little thing in the first few years of life. I remember the smile Nick, Sam, and Hannah had when they had those first few baby teeth. Precious. Why in my heart do I think maybe Noah's mom rejoiced at his smile when he laughed a 4 tooth smile with the tooth he lost tonight. That one little tooth is my connection to his mom...it's all I have of her...well that tooth and Noah. : >)

You Can Take the Kid Out of Ethiopia but...December 20, 2008

2009-02-12T13:21:00.000-08:00

...You Can’t Take Ethiopia out of the Kid.

Exhibit A: Yesterday morning Noah was mad at Nick and said in a very clear sentence..."You woman...go back to kitchen and cook." Oh yeh...I heard it because I was right there in the kitchen cooking Noah his daily breakfast burrito...with salsa. Nick stopped in his tracks... and stared at me. Zak dropped his DS to his lap... and stared at me. Sam looked up from playing with the cats... and stared at me. They all knew what was coming because at one time or another they too had made that same error in chauvinist pig judgement. Not to worry though, I was kind to Noah and simply told him, spatula waving in hand, if he felt women were that low on the scale of life then I would just stop cooking for him as he didn't need a woman in his life. He got that part. I told him the right choice would be to never say that again in my house. He got that part. I told him those comments are wrong and someday he will get a slap in the face from some beautiful girl if he mutters a comment like that again. He got it. His big brown eyes looked back at me with much regret. He came up soon after and said he was very very sorry. I forgave him...as I wiped the ‘cooked with love’ breakfast burrito crumbs from his cheeks. ; >)

Exhibit B: Last night I stole away and took a bath. I came out calm and relaxed and Noah ambushed me with a hug from no where. He stepped back in despair after hugging me and said, "What happened mama...you grandma", and then he pointed at my chest. I had just got out of the tub and was in my PJ's...without any support if you know what I mean. Yeh...in his book I’ve got the chest of a grandmas. I guess that's ok being that the life expectancy in Ethiopia is 45 or so...so my 'grandma boobs' fit the age. Still, not exactly a sensitive delivery of the news.

December 14, 2008

2009-02-12T13:20:00.000-08:00

The first snow flake in Noah’s life was really quite hilarious. We’ve been anxiously waiting for Noah’s first snow because as with every other new thing in Noah’s life, we knew this would be full of drama and excitement. "Cyber Zak" was monitoring the impending snow storm on the KATU.com satellite radar on the Mac...watching as the blue radar cloud of snow surrounding our ‘home’ was slowly closing in on the tiny ‘island’ of green on the radar. In Zak's words, "Snow... is... coming". Here's the blow by blow.

"Snow fall 1.33 miles away." 5 minutes later...reload. "Snow is now .94 miles away." 5 minutes later...reload. "Snow .26 miles away." Remember...these updates are not smooth and calming like those you would hear from Rhonda on Channel 2...these are all out bombastic yells.

Soon all the boys were huddled around the computer screen. Zak reloads the image and the arrow indicating our exact location is now covered in blue. Zak raises his arms to the sky and yells, "SNOW IS HERE!" The boys are jumping around dancing...staring at the computer and the blueness covering the map...backs totally turned to the window where if they had checked for themselves they would have seen the first snowflake fall. Jeff and I just sat at the table rolling our eyes. Zak does have a way of commanding attention...even when the first snow of winter is knocking at the back door.

So...on to Noah's reaction. After I told the kids to turn around and check out the real deal the race was on to see who could get out first. After years of practice Sam, Nick, and Zak knew the protocol for getting their snow clothes on. Noah...well...I kind of forgot to do the low down for getting dressed for snow. In the hustle and cloud of snow clothes I realized Noah was not among the others. Instead, he was already outside...boots but no socks...sweatshirt but no coat and no gloves...gazing out into our green field... snowboard tucked under his arm...starring down the green grass...waiting... as if he was a surfer on the oceans edge... waiting for that one big perfect wave. He waited and waited...but sadly the snow never came...just that first little flake and maybe about 5000 more.

Noah’s first snow was a bust...but I have a feeling come Wednesday or there about he will get another chance to actually experience his first taste of Pacific Northwest snowfall. I’ll keep you posted.

December 2, 2008

2009-02-12T13:19:00.002-08:00

It comes with great relief and happiness that I can say we safely made it through our first major holiday with Noah. Not that is wasn’t without questioning glances and extensive Amharic commentary from him, but for the most part he rolled with it. Along the way he helped forge some unforgettable moments.

On the subject of Turkey:

This past month of school the subject of turkey was figuratively on the front burner. It took Noah a little time to realize that a turkey wasn’t a chicken and it wasn’t a duck and so for the first week or so he would call a turkey a ‘chuck’...the combination of chicken and a duck. Once he got the terminology figured we were ready to move on to introducing the concept of Pilgrims and their roll in the life (or death as it is) of a turkey. He found it fascinating that the men pilgrims would go out with their guns and shoot the wild turkey and the women would pluck and cook the bird. So... for several days leading up to Thanksgiving Noah would proudly state that Jeff was going to go turkey hunting. As he tells the story he takes his hand to his neck and mimics a knife cutting off the head of the turkey. Jeff would always stand behind Noah sheepishly smiling as I agreed that would be a very very cool thing for dad to do. So Thanksgiving morning arrived...and Noah’s face showed the excitement that should only be reserved for a child on Christmas morning. Today....his dad is going to cut the head off of a turkey. Instead of setting Noah straight by showing him a wrapped turkey in the fridge Jeff proudly displayed the turkey going into the oven plucked AND headless. Noah’s face dropped...tears filled his eyes...he thought HE was going to be able to be the one to cut the head off the turkey. So the family lost a little in translation of his Ethiopian excitement leading up to Thanksgiving day...none the less Noah still thinks his dad is so COOL for being a turkey hunter.

Praying at church:

We were at church Sunday and Noah knelt down to pray. With Noah everything is loud...and it’s not like our family doesn’t stand out in a crowd anyway. So Noah knelt in the middle of St. John’s church, eyes closed tight, hands clasped in prayer, palms together and he started his prayer on the high end of the volume scale, " I pledge allegiance to the flag, of the United States of America...." Hannah was mortified...because once again I say...Noah is loud so everyone around us heard. She was begging me to make him stop...I just couldn't. He was soooo sincere.

The Concept of Christmas:

The wonderful thing with Noah is he does have a comprehension of the true meaning of Christmas...that it is about the birth of Jesus. He was raised Orthodox Christian by his family. The questions about a tree in the house...and who is this Santa Claus and what does he have to do with Jesus, well that’s another story. On Sunday...Hannah, Noah, and Sam were putting up the nativity scene. We don't put out the baby until Christmas day because...well...that's when he was born. For the month of December Mary, Joseph and the various animals are just hanging around waiting for the signal from above to plop the baby in the hay. So there sits an empty manger...much to Noah’s displeasure. Sam slyly takes one of the sheep while Noah isn't looking, turns it upside down and lays it in the manger....legs pointing straight up to the angel on the top of the stable. Now Mary and Joseph are kneeling in prayer to a sheep that looks like rigor mortis has set in as IT lies away in the manger. Noah in the mean time had gone out to find Jeff to bring him back to show him the 'beautiful' baby sleeping, thinking I was going to bend on his argument that the baby must be put in the manger right now. Noah is not short on dramatics. So...when he came back in with Jeff and saw not Jesus but a sheep in the manger his eyes doubled in size and his voice rose and these are his exact words, "goodness gracious me...no no no baby in bed!!... Sheet (sheep)...no no no!!" Long story short...Noah knows the story of Christmas and that is making this season much easier to move forward with. Now the Santa thing...still not sure how I am going to approach that.

Pop Culture:

Right now Noah’s favorite past time is watching the classic cartoon Jonny Quest. He engages so much into it that he has renamed our dog, Duncan, Jonny’s dog’s name, Bandit. Last night he has asked if we could start calling him Haji, (Jonny’s faithful sidekick who is usually seen wearing a turban.) He’s starting to quote lines from the cartoon...and for the most part they are surprisingly in context to what we are doing at the time. We took him to his first movie last week, to see Madagascar 2 and since then every chance he gets he likes to break into song and dance from the movie... “I like to moj it, moj it...I like to moj it moj it...I like to MOJ IT.”

He keeps us giggling daily...his innocence and vitality are so refreshing.

November 20, 2008

2009-02-12T13:19:00.001-08:00

Over the past several weeks we have been asked, “How is Noah doing?” Although our answer is typically a canned response, “fine...he’s really learning the language...has bonded with the family...blah blah blah....”, the fact of the matter is behind those beautiful eyes is a grieving little boy. As his language has developed so has his ability to express the losses he has experienced in his very young life. Last week his grief came to the surface in an emotional yet beautiful evening for the entire family. What began as a simple discipline issue erupted into an all out melt down for Noah. He was unapproachable in his room....crying...screaming. Then his cries and screams turned into moans and wails. Zak, who was standing by me the entire time, looked at me in concern and said, “Mom, that’s the sound I would make when there was nothing more I could do.” It triggered my memory and he was right it was the same sound Zak had made 5 years earlier...Noah was done and all he had left inside him was the moans of someone who had nothing left to give. I went back into his room and this time he let me pick him up and rock him in my arms...he completely melted into me sobbing, “I have no family, I have no family”. I motioned Zak to go get all the kids. Although difficult for them given the emotional state Noah was in, they needed to look Noah in the eye and let him know...he was loved and he had a family. Every one took their turn hugging him through the tears. He calmed down and began talking about his life...his life before us...before WACAP....before the orphanage. Some information we already knew and some we learned for the very first time sitting in a circle on the floor of his bedroom.

Thankful...once again because of this journey with Noah I have to express that I am now seeing this word...thankful...in a whole new light. Last week we realized the extent of love Noah still has for the people he left behind in Ethiopia. Both his parents passed away early in his life from Tuberculosis. His mom’s sister, who was raising her family alone as it was, took Noah in for two years. During that time she gave birth to a baby...a little girl named Galeila. Last week, through his tears Noah talked about Galeila. She was a good baby. He gave her water when she was thirsty. At night his aunt, Galeila, and Noah shared a bed and Galeila would cuddle into Noah and sleep. Noah loved Galeila. One day his aunt couldn’t feed everyone in the family...there was not enough food. Through tears Noah told us of the day his aunt had him say goodbye to Galeila and she walked the baby to the orphanage to relinquish her for adoption. Galeila was, we are guessing, about 8 months old. When she got back to their shack he and his aunt cried. I am not sure of the span of time before it was Noah’s turn to take the walk to the orphanage with his aunt, but it was long enough that by the time he got there Galeila was gone.

Thankful...a word that this time of year can be overused and misunderstood. My thanks this year extend to a lady surviving in a steel sided shack on the fringes of the poorest city in Ethiopia. My thanks this year extend to this lady who cared for my son when she could not even provide for her own child. I will honor the strength and courage of this brave lady this year and for years to come. She is the image I will see when I close my eyes and pray this Thanksgiving.

October 31, 2008

2009-02-12T13:18:00.001-08:00

We are done with Homecoming week and have moved on to Halloween. I was just telling Nick this has been the quietest and least stressful Halloween on record. Why, I don’t know...maybe it’s because my older kids have chosen to sit out this year so I am only focusing on Sam and Noah. Sam is fine being a Clone Warrior again this year and Noah is basically happy being whatever as long as he is being something. He’s settled on Superman...you can check out the pictures on the album page.

We have come up with a nickname for our ‘twins’... Oscar and Felix. The revelation came to Jeff and I last weekend when we were carving pumpkins. Sam patiently sat criss-cross apple sauce carefully picking the pumpkin scum off of his Jack O Lantern with the precision of a surgeon’s scalpel. Noah....well Noah not only scooped the pumpkin scum out with both arms buried to the elbow inside his Jack O Lantern but once he had the scum out on the ground he began doing a dance on the guts as if he were making pumpkin wine with his stomping. Guts were ooozing between his toes...seeds squirting from his heels...and a smile beyond wide crossed his face. At the end of the carving he happily turned his carved pumpkin upside down, the opening resting on his head, as if he was ready to deliver it to market. Every day is a new and fun day with Noah. : > )

Last Saturday we had a “Noah Moment of Perspective” in regards to Hannah’s homecoming evening. Noah’s reaction was a moment I will never forget. It is a reminder of how far apart our cultures really are. He walked in the room where all the girls were dressed up and just whispered to me, "beautiful girls." Then when the boys showed up he just stood silently in the wings watching as they exchanged corsages and boutonnieres. I could tell his mind was racing with thoughts. When everyone started filing out to the front yard for pictures Noah began to panic...he ran to me and started crying, "Hannah. Go. Boy." I think he really thought this was some ceremony where we were passing Hannah on to Ryan's family. Think about it...my mom, the elder, came in from out of town.... flowing dresses...fancy hair...the exchange of flowers....an American experience he has never witnessed. The only thing in his mind that was missing was a cow to pass on to Ryan’s family. So Hannah knelt down to Noah and talked to him, comforted him, told him she'd be back later, gave him big hugs, and told him she loves him. He calmed down enough for me to go outside with the rest of the mom’s for pictures. I'm in the middle of snapping pictures of the kids when I hear a drum beat behind me. He's gone inside and found the Ethiopian drum I brought home and is enthusiastically pounding the drum to a rhythmic beat...constant...over and over...for the next 15 minutes or so while pictures are being taken. Finally the kids are ready to file into the van. Wide eyed he watches as Hannah is climbing into the van and then turns his head into me and starts sobbing again. He thought she was leaving our home...for good. We brought him back inside and calmed him down again for the evening. You can only imagine his thrill when Hannah walked out of her bedroom Sunday morning. She smiled a good morning smile to him and he jumped into her arms and wouldn't let go. So my moment of perspective... how flowers, beautiful dresses, and fancy hair within two completely different cultures can have such different meanings in the eyes of a six year old little boy...and also how amazing it is that in just one months time this little boy has fallen so in love with his big sister that the thought of her not in his life brought him to genuine tears. Pretty cool....

October 24, 2008

2009-02-12T13:17:00.001-08:00

Noah is doing great. We have setbacks now and then but overall he’s moving forward. I think the biggest challenge now is keeping him busy during the weekends. He loves the routine that Monday-Friday gives him. There’s just a little too much free time on the weekends. Last Saturday, for instance, I could not stop him from working around the house. He trimmed my roses and other plants...hauled two wheel barrow loads of compost down to the woods. I told him he didn’t have to do that, go and play. He washed my car with a rag and Duncan’s water dish...I told him he didn’t have to do that, go and play. He washed down the patio and scrubbed it with a push broom...I told him he didn’t have to do that, go and play. He folded a basket of laundry...I told him he didn’t have to do that, go and play. He mended a hole under the dog kennel with mud and river rock...I told him he didn’t have to do that, go and play. Finally I thought he was settled into hanging out with Nick at the tree fort. Jeff and I had a free moment to talk...when up from the woods Noah appears...carrying a wood crucifix about 3 feet tall on his back...like Jesus from the Passion of Christ. He had built Jeff and I a ‘mesket’ or wooded cross with some leftover wood from Nick’s tree fort and was walking up through the field with his creation resting on his back...once again, like Jesus. : >) He was SO proud of it and marched right inside with it and placed it on our fireplace. So....here comes the weekend and my challenge is having Noah try to act like a typical 6 year old... a challenge for which he has never been given the chance...until now.

October 16, 2008

2009-02-12T13:16:00.001-08:00

It’s been a while since I last updated. Life’s busy...what can I say. : >) Noah Musse started first grade on October 6. So far so good...I’ve stayed close to home and the phone just in case but he has an amazing teacher who is going to make him soar over the next months. He will also be getting one-on-one pullout time several times a week to work on his language and reading development. One of the many benefits of Cindy teaching on his campus is her class has taken a genuine interest in Noah, his story, and his future. She had thrown out the idea of having a few students from her 5th grade class come to Noah’s class to give him some one-on-one help as well as work with him on his language development. Last week she asked her class who would be interested in being a tutor for Noah. 22 of her 26 students raised their hands! It’s such an exciting notion...how both sides will benefit from such a cool experience. Her students and Noah will grow so much from their time together.

On the home front we have morphed ourselves into a family of 7. For the most part he has settled in nicely to his role has the youngest ( by 79 days...and Sam won’t let you forget it) He’s finding that he doesn’t have to sweep the floor, do the dishes, fold laundry etc. in order to belong. Zak was the same way...you’d never know it now by the way he tosses his dirty clothes on the floor....but there was a time where all the families shoes were lined up and his clothes were neatly folded.

Hannah and Noah continue to have an amazing relationship. She can’t go through the day without at least 70 kisses laid upon her face. One on the forehead, one on the chin, one on the left cheek, one on the right cheek and one more on the forehead for good measure. Do the math...5 kisses x 14 encounters a day = 70 kisses. Personality wise I am seeing Noah and Hannah the more similar among our kids. The other night Hannah put on a woven skirt and top I bought for her at the weavers market in Addis. She came out and Noah’s eyes lit up...except he was quite concerned that she didn’t finish her outfit with the proper accessories so he motioned to her to go back into her room and find the scarf that went with the outfit. When she came out again with the scarf he taught her 5 different ways to wrap the scarf for different occasions. The next night at dinner he insisted she come to dinner dressed up and in a scarf....again. She loved every minute of it.

Nick and Noah have bonded over the tree fort Nick is building. I’m not sure if Noah knows it’s for fun and not Nick’s future home. : >) He’s taking the role of assistant seriously though. The other day they were down in the woods and Noah started to make a garden for Nick out of the fresh dirt of a mole hill. He came back up to the house and brought down some roses he had cut. He stuck them into the ground and then blew off the pedals and told Nick, in his own language of hand gestures, that the seeds he blew would make new flowers for Nick’s house.

Noah and Zak are probably to most opposite of the kids...but trust me, that is not a bad thing. I love all my kid’s individual personalities. It keeps me from getting bored. : >) Zak is a driven perfectionist who sees things only in black and white. Let’s just say at this point Noah leaves a lot of room for the grey in the middle. As far as roommates...they are perfect for each other. Zak’s working on the ‘alpha male’ role and is definitely making progress. : >) The other day we had a scare with Zak and his health. When Noah realized the seriousness of it, and that I was on the phone with Zak’s heart doctor, he became genuinely scared and kept a watchful eye on Zak all day. Zak is fine now...and he is back to ‘normal’ with his health.

Sam and Noah continue to grow everyday. It is a fun relationship to watch. One minute they are having a blast the next minute they are at opposite ends of the house doing their own thing. Works for me! The other day Sam came home from school with a fever. Noah, became very concerned, came up to me and said, “Ethiopia medicine.” He went outside and walked around the yard looking at the plants we have. He settled on the lavender. Plucked two stalks with a flower and came back inside. He walked over to Sam, who was crashed on the couch with a towel on his forehead (placed by Zak) and put one of the stalks on Sam’s head and the other he said, “Ethiopia medicine...Sam hot...eat,” while he mimicked eating the leaves of the lavender. Sam was in no mood to eat a lavender plant so I diverted Noah with hugs and thanks while placing his beautiful thought on the counter.

Every day is a new experience with Noah. He is so excited about every new thing he encounters. Last night he came running in from outside all excited that he was watching the monkeys play in the trees. His monkeys are our squirrels. He was watching the squirrels play. : >) So I got out the Pacific Northwest Mammal book and showed him a picture of a squirrel. He jumped up and down excitedly and said, “yes yes...American monkey!!” So...FYI....until further notice...at least in our house...we have American monkeys in our backyard.

Until next time.....

Hugs and Love,

Julie

October 4, 2008

2009-02-12T13:15:00.001-08:00

Well we just finished our first week at home as a family of 7...yikes...I’ve never seen that in print. A family of SEVEN!

I have to admit that I am cautiously saying so far so good. Jeff did a great job of running the family her while I was with Noah Musse in Ethiopia.

Noah is doing well. He has definitely bonded with each family member on their own terms. He sees Hannah as more of an aunt figure and thus reveres her...something H said she could really get use to since the other three brothers don’t seem to. : >) A few days ago I was looking for Noah and H called down from her room to say he was with her. I went down there and she was standing in the middle of her room while Noah was picking up her clothes off the floor and folding them neatly on her bed he had just made for her. I looked at her and said, “this is SO wrong.” She smiled back at me and said, “maybe...but check out my clean room.” He has hence been banned from being Hannah’s personal servant. He just wants to please SO bad.

He really looks up to Nick...especially after the first morning he was home. Nick pulled out the frying pan and made Noah his first breakfast in America....scrambled eggs. He’s also watched Nick in his first football game and was really quite confused by the whole concept of American football...although he loved Nick’s helmet and pads. He used his first sani-can at the football game. You KNOW sani-cans are disgusting when someone who has just recently come over from Ethiopia, where pit toilets were the norm, turns up his nose at the inside of a Honey Bucket. Either that or he is really quickly conforming to elitist American standards. : >)

Zak has been a wonderful big brother to him. They share a room so Zak has bared the brunt of Noah’s early morning wakings. He’s gently guided Noah back to bed several mornings in the early hours. I think now Zak ‘gets’ what families go through during the transition phase of adoption. He was on the other side 5 years ago this month and every now and then he makes mention of his appreciation of the work we put into making him feel like he was home. Zak is growing during this process...I am so proud of him.

Sam...without question...has had the roughest go of it. We’ve had some tears and conversation about bringing in a new family member. Sam is analytical, thoughtful, quiet, and compassionate...he has had to process this change on his own terms. I have seen in the past 24 hours an accepting change taking place. Right now he, Jeff, and Noah are having an afternoon out together buying Bionicles at Target. Sam and Noah are going to build them together this evening. Sam is going to be fine. We would have never entered this adoption if we knew our children couldn’t handle it...fortunately we are seeing hearts opening in all the kids to their new little brother.

And now on to Noah...he is a character. It’s always a fear when you adopt that the child will not bond with the family. This is not the case with Noah. As I mentioned in my journal he ran to me and hasn’t let go of the concept of family from day one. He is very sweet...compassionate...curious. This new world of gadgets fascinates him. The phrase he learned first and foremost... “don’t touch”. We get a chuckle now and then when he pulls a “George of the Jungle” stunt....like a few nights ago he took a coon skin hat off the wall that was hung for a decoration and washed it by hand and hung it up to dry like a pelt. Then we have touching moments...he found Hannah’s old tea set and set up an Ethiopian coffee ceremony and invited our whole family to take part in it. Of course he kind of lost the seriousness of the moment when he served the coffee in Hannah’s blue taffeta princess dress and a purple and gold afro wig...but...it was the thought that counts. : >)

Noah’s health for the most part is good. His stomach/intestines are full of parasites etc. that he picked up in Africa, living in such poor unsanitary conditions. He’s on medications for all of the junk in his belly and it should be cleared out by mid-week. This is another concept Zak has forgotten from his early adoption days...and when I told him I had to do the same for him that I am doing for Noah (waiting for the poop to fall and then running the sample to the lab within one hour for a proper culture to be taken) he was speechless. It’s what we do...to make our sons better. So long story short...Noah and all of the Barclay’s are doing well. Noah starts school on Monday and of course I will be on call AND on pins and needles those first few days. Cindy teaches on the same campus and we have visited her class several times this week. It is comforting to know she is just footsteps away from him as well. They are quite a pair. :>)

Thanks to everyone for all their kind words of support over the past several weeks. It may not be acknowledged but it is appreciated more than I can ever express.

Ethiopia Day 8 September 26, 2008

2009-02-12T13:14:00.000-08:00

9/26/08

The Beginning of Firsts

How can I describe the past 36 hours but time passed laughing, crying, celebrating, hugging, sadness, exhaustion.. I haven’t laid down in over a day and a half now…as we filled our final day in Addis in Starlet, Helen’s car. She wanted to take us to a coffee factory for a tour as well as take us by one of her favorite shops. Starlet is a cute car by Addis standards but you are still taking our life into your own hands when you close the tin can doors of the blue Toyota hatchback. As Cindy said, she hasn’t got the shifting down so that makes it just about as nerve racking as it gets…especially when she stalls out at a major intersection or when a 1962 VW bug passes us on a steep hill because she forgets to put it in 1st gear. An adventure and laughs to say the least. Helen insisted on taking us to her favorite bathroom in the city…she goes there all the time when she is out and about. We crossed the poverty barrier that are the gates of the Sheraton Addis and treated ourselves to the luxury of actually sitting on a toilet and using toilet paper from a roll, not a wad from our backpacks, and washing our hands with liquid soap and not Purell. You honestly don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone. : >) After the Sheraton we drove to the Hilton to check in at the KLM office for our flight out later that night. We had a nice tour of the coffee factory and have walked away with a great appreciation of what goes into a single cup of coffee. The labor alone…amazing.

We treated Mr. Teklu and Helen for lunch at the Aladdin after the factory tour. Once again we had good laughs and good conversation. Mr. Teklu is such an amazing advocate for the children of Ethiopia as is Helen. I can see a great future of them working together for the children of their country.

Helen and her staff had a final coffee ceremony for us before we left for the airport. We gifted her with a book of the origin of coffee…Kaldi and the Dancing Goat…as the night before she attempted to tell us the story but completely botched the whole thing totally confusing us and leaving us in hysterics. We figured a book with the real story would keep other guests from being as confused as we were. : >) We gave the three ladies on staff scented candles and Solomon, a gentle soul of a man who really was such a positive male for Noah this week, a tool box I had picked up before we left for Ethiopia. I knew somewhere in Ethiopia there would be a man deserving of a set of tools and Solomon was that wonderful man.

Mr. Teklu and his driver took us to the airport around 7:30 pm. It was a very bitter sweet goodbye and I don’t think Noah really understood that this was really goodbye until we were at the ticket counter and tears just began to stream down his face. He realized that the wonderful kind Mr. Teklu would no longer be on this adoption journey with him. It was a sad realization for all of us.

We met up with Melat, Jennifer, and Tigist for the final step of this journey to bring Noah home. They flew with us to Amsterdam and are continuing on to Seattle on a separate flight. In the past 24 hours Noah has encountered many firsts…his first backpack…his first plane ride…his first escalator ride….his first moving sidewalk ride….his first drink from a drinking fountain…his first ice cube….his first listen to Rhianna, Coldplay, Madonna…and he has smiled his smile of amazement with each and every moment. This long long day is just the beginning of an amazing journey with Noah Musse Barclay.

Ethiopia Day 7 September 24, 2008

2009-02-12T13:13:00.002-08:00

9/24/08 Wednesday

We started our morning by going to the Heile Selasie market to buy souvenirs. Noah was not interested in a trip like that at all and chose to stay back at the guest house with the staff while Cindy and I had Ayella drive us. The Heile Selasie market is a no bartering store where can purchase wonderful items made in Ethiopia. We spent a couple hours just looking around and buying. We also made it back to the Weaver’s co-op to buy some more scarves. Funny story: We are in one store where the walls are just covered in colorful fabrics made into scarves and dresses. We are talking to one of the owners when the second owner sneaks in, a small woman with a scarf wrapped around her so the only thing showing is her face. She silently stands behind Cindy for a couple of minutes while Cindy peruses the scarf selection. Cindy turns around right when the lady makes a slight move and it sends Cindy to the ceiling with surprise. She thought the lady was a mannequin and when she moved she startled Cindy so much she screamed. We were all laughing about it when Cindy let out her trademark snort and that just sent the two ladies into doubled over laughter. The one lady with the scarf was laughing so hard she had to turn her head into the fabric to keep her composure. We all laughed for about 5 minutes and when Cindy walked out the one owner smiled at her and said, ‘this is good’…meaning we all crossed the language border with our laughter. It was priceless. Traveling with Cindy is a refreshing…she is quick to have conversations with anyone and can break the ice with a simple smile. I am grateful to have her along this adventure.

We made it back to the New Flower just in time for Mr. Teklu to drop by Noah’s passport and visa. He is officially cleared to come home. Yahoo! After that we drove to the WACAP house for a goodbye party for Noah. We brought gifts for the staff, played with the babies, and had more coffee. Love this coffee! It is clear that Noah was well loved at the WACAP house. They were all very excited to see him and were very sad to say good-bye. They are wonderful there…the have a genuine love for the children. It was a most memorable goodbye. I just pray that someday Noah can come back and give back to such a special place. I also told Mr. Teklu about Hana, the little girl in Nazareth who is orphaned and has HIV. Cindy gave him Mr. Dewit’s contact information and Teklu has promised us he will help Hana. She will have to be brought to an orphanage first and then hopefully will be processed at AHOPE so she can get the proper medicine to slow down the progression of the HIV. Her face will be in my thoughts…her heart and health in my prayers.

Tonight we took Helen out for dinner at a fine Italian restaurant. We had beautiful Ethiopian artwork surrounding us. We even caught a glimpse of one of Mr. Wassi Hu’s art, although Helen swears it isn’t the one and only one who gave Cindy his phone number earlier in the week. We had such a wonderful time…so much laughter…so much conversation. Noah was pretty bored for most of the meal and at one point even called the waiter over to clear our dishes off the table so we could leave. Helen explained to him that was not appropriate and that he is not the boss. He then said if we wanted to continue talking we should take him home so he could go to bed and we could stay up and talk. Hmmmmmm….maybe he is a descendant of the Emporer Heile Selasse as his last name by birth would indicate. So we get home and he gets his pj’s on and is expecting to watch tv tonight. Through Helen I tell him no…he was so tired at the restaurant that he needs to go to bed. Also his bossy behavior at the restaurant to a stranger is reason enough to have an early bedtime without the reward of t.v. He was truly sorry when he saw how disappointed I was and actually hugged me and said he was sorry..in English. I’ve got my work cut out for me…but deep down he’s a great kid.

So it’s my last night in Ethiopia and I have been changed forever. I LOVE this country, it’s people, it’s landscape. There is so much love among the people. Yes the poverty is overwhelming…yes their government is beyond corrupt and anyone you talk to will tell you as much…but I love this country and the people at the grassroots level who are trying to make a difference. I have been touched…by the families who were with us at the New Flower…the staff at the WACAP House…Mr. Teklu…Helen…Mr. Dewitt…our driver Ayalla…Wassi Hu : >)…a little girl named Hana…the beggars on the streets…a two month old baby at AHOPE with HIV…a little boy I am bringing home to his family forever… I am changed.

Ethiopia Day 6 September 23, 2008

2009-02-12T13:13:00.001-08:00

9/23/08 Tuesday

This morning we walked up to Kaldi’s coffee ( a very good knock off to Starbucks….even down to the trademark green sign) to meet Mr. Dawit who was driving us down to Nazareth to visit his schools. While we were waiting for him I took Noah up to the counter to see if there was anything he wanted, thinking a pastry or something. He exchanged conversation with one of the waitresses and I decided a guava juice would be perfect for him. So we sit down…and soon three blended smoothies arrive at our table. Hmmmmmm…Cindy and I look at each other and then the waitress and tell her we didn’t order anything for ourselves but I had ordered a single guava juice for Noah. Ok, so the waitress takes the two drinks away. Soon she arrives back with a giant hamburger and a plate of fries. I looked at the waitress and said…”we didn’t order this”…she looked at me and said, “he did” gesturing to Noah. The conversation Noah had with the waitress that I thought was idle chit-chat…he was ordering a hamburger and fries for himself AND drinks around the table for Cindy and I. So what should have been a simple 5 birr tab turned into a 37 birr table tab…still extremely cheap as all of that cost about $3.50 in US dollars. As ‘cute’ as it was I had to reprimand him…and the tears did not go over well with the waitresses as they stood by with evil eyes for the remainder of the time it took for Noah to finish his burger. ANYWAY….we got out of dodge quickly when Mr. Dawit arrived.

We drove south of Addis to Nazareth. He and his wife have dedicated their lives to educating the poorest of the poor children in that community. They have opened up two schools in the community, the English Alive Academy. Most of the children are there through sponsorships. Our first stop was a school for Pre K- 2nd grade. The children were in line washing up for snack time when we arrived. After snack they had playtime. It was during this time that we got to play with them…take pictures of them and show them on the digital screen of the camera…and just laugh with them. They were soooo cute and so happy to be in school. At the first school we visited there were 83 children in a school building and yard that would equal about 2 classrooms in size. After play time they went back to their classrooms. We had brought candy for them so Noah went into each classroom and handed out candy. He was very proud of the chance to share the candy. He really enjoyed playing with the kids as well.

Here’s today’s defining moment with Noah: We are in the ‘library’ (which consists of maybe 75 books for 83 children) when Noah comes running in. He asks for his blue bag that has all of his crayons. I get it out for him and he takes it to the 1st grade classroom and hands out all of his special crayons and colored pencils to the students in that classroom. I didn’t tell him to. He did it on his own. So there is my son…with nothing really to call his own except for the clothes on his back only days before…taking his new pencils and crayons and handing them out to someone who needs them more. A very proud moment for this new mom.

Next we traveled to the school for older children…2-4th grade but the students were as old as 13. Mr. Dawit had told us about one little girl who is a student in this school. Her name is Hana. Hana’s parents are both dead of AIDS and she had been living by herself since their death. Hana is 8 years old. Hana is HIV-positive. The neighbors told Mr. Dawit about Hana and he took her into his school. After school he believes she is taken care of by neighbors. We met Hana and yes, she does look sick but for 6 hours a day she can be the little girl she should be among the children of Mr. Dawit’s school. Cindy and I are hopeful in talking to Mr. Teklu about Hana in the hopes that he may advocate for her to enter the AHOPE orphanage where she can get proper medicine for her HIV. It would be a dream if she could eventually be advocated for adoption but first she must get her health back and so tomorrow we talk to Teklu.

Today I was hugged, kissed, and touched by 136 children in the poorest of the poor region of Ethiopia. By the end of the day Cindy and I conceded that there will be a ‘fungus among-us’ but how could you not be touched, both physically and emotionally by these children. I think we both agree as well that a piece of our hearts will forever be in beautiful little oasis of learning on the edge of the Great Rift Valley.

Ethiopia Day 5 September 22, 2008

2009-02-12T13:12:00.001-08:00

9/22/08

Today was our embassy appointment day. Mr. Teklu came over to the guest house with Jessica and Melat so we could all go together to file our papers. Unfortunately the embassy lost one document that had been cabled over from WACAP so there was a few hours where I honestly thought I would not be leaving on Thursday night. Fortunately Megan got on her e-mail right away at 3:00am and emailed the embassy insisting that she had filed it and it was their oversight. We returned to the embassy after coming back to the guest house for lunch and suddenly the document appeared. Phew…so I turned in the paperwork, answered 5 questions about Noah Musse’s life before he came into my custody and Waalaa…he was declared our son. Amazing how much anxiety can accompany what would seem to be a simple task.

Another defining moment today….we are in the van waiting in traffic (as it seems like we always do) when a woman whose eyes were clouded with cataracts appeared at our van door, begging for food. She stood at the window in front of Noah and motioned with her hands that she was hungry and wanted him to give her food. He locked eyes with her and in a very sad sorrowful glance shook his head and raised his hands up to the sky motioning that he could not. She asked again. This time his big brown beautiful eyes just took her in. He just stared at her as she continued to motion for just one piece of food. Cindy and I sat in silence…watching this little guy who, only months earlier was in that beggars shoes pleading for just one bite, be on the other side of the coin. I brought a new jacket for Noah to wear…he is so proud of it and he wore it today because it was bit rainy. He put on that new jacket today and suddenly in the eyes of those who beg…he was a ‘have’ to those who ‘have not’ on the streets of Addis. One clean new jacket…

After our embassy appt. we went to AHOPE an orphanage for HIV infected children. The children were beautiful, kind, respectful, funny…and were loved as best they could be. What a place. I held the hand of a 2 month old baby who had just been relinquished earlier that day. I laughed at an adorable little boy, Ebram, who did the old top of the thumb disconnecting from the rest of the thumb trick…and he was really good at it. I stood in line to use the bathroom ( if you gotta go, you gotta go) and we celebrated the adoption of a little girl with 23 beautiful children who are just a drop in the bucket of the children infected with HIV throughout Ethiopia. Almost one million…so now I am crying. The first tears I’ve shed in all the days we’ve been here. Yes…what is going on over here is mind boggling, unfair, wrong, and seemingly impossible to fix…but we cannot give up on these children. As we were leaving Mr. Teklu was taking the names of a couple of children. He will advocate for them. It’s people like Mr. Teklu who drive these streets every day and sees the despair, yet he forges on, he finds our children and he makes it his personal mission to fix this problem one child at a time. It’s the least any of us can do.

Ethiopia Day 4 September 21, 2008

2009-02-12T13:10:00.000-08:00

9/21/08

Yesterday we had a wonderful day. We hired a driver through Helen, Ayella, who drove us north of the city to and area called Debre Labanos. It was about a 2-3 hour drive. We saw the most beautiful countryside I have ever seen. This is one part of Ethiopia where the new and successful floriculture industry is thriving. Leaving Addis we drove up and over Mt. Entoto…gave a quick wave to Mr. Wassi Hu…and descended down the other side of the mountain into sweeping green valleys lush with grasses and flowers. I am sure 75% of the population in Addis has know idea how beautiful their country is on the other side of the mountain. As we drove farther along round thatched roof huts with cow dung siding replaced the corrugated steel shacks of the city. We passed through a couple of bustling villages...maybe about a half mile strip of condensed shacks where children played in mud and standing water, older boys kicked soccer balls, fuse ball tables were crowded around, women tended to their daily chores, and buses loaded and unloaded their passengers. Donkeys, cows, goats, and dogs wandered the streets. I put dogs in the same category as the others because they really are not domesticated, as we would assume. If a person has a dog it is for guarding or herding…not for companionship. Most of the dogs in the city are stray and wild. Not to be approached of petted by any means.

We reached the Portuguese Bridge about midday. Any road not on the main road is exceptionally rough to travel. The roads we took yesterday were no exception. I’m not sure about the elevation we ascended to on our drive but the air was definitely thin. We went for a hike to the bridge. We paralleled the ridge of canyon that in width could easily be compared to the Grand Canyon. Baboons played and feasted on prickly pear cactus and grass just below us. On this canyon there were no safety rails, so there were a few times where there wasn’t a whole lot of room between the edge of the cliff and our path. We walked through a gate, which apparently was the border between private property and government land. A self-appointed ‘guide’ for the remainder of the hike joined each of us. We really had no choice as they wouldn’t take no for an answer. They all were around 20 years of age. The Portuguese Bridge crossed a river, which created a waterfall just beyond the bridge. It truly was a breathtaking site….and at times I was still pinching myself that I was standing at a waterfall in Ethiopia.

As I mentioned earlier, Noah loves taking Polaroid pictures and showing them off. At one point of our hike I was walking along and realized he wasn’t behind me. I went back a few hundred feet to look for him. Children of the local farmers, with their herding staffs, surrounded him in hand, showing off his pictures to them. I stood back and observed for a minute. He is very expressive in his hand gestures and was rattling off what I figured was an explanation of who he was and why he was with this white woman because all at once they took their eyes off him and all turned their eyes on me. I called his name and he ran to me and put his arms around me, glancing back to the children as if to say, “See…I told you so.” For the remainder of the trip they followed at a safe distance observing Noah and his new mom.

The only down part of the whole hike was at the end when we were finished and our guides become somewhat aggressive in wanting us to buy their souvenirs. Not only were they aggressive but also about 15 more boys came from nowhere to try to sell their things to us. One even tied a pendant around Noah’s neck and told him his mom would buy it for him. Fortunately Ayella stepped in and pushed them back for us and we made a quick walk to the other side of the gate where they could not follow.

Our next stop was the monastery at Debre Lebanos. The road into that was lined with lush forests. Every now and then we would spy families of baboons. There were also pockets of children who would chase our car for handouts. It’s so hard to ignore them…so very very hard. There were also large groups of elderly sitting on the side of the road holding their hands out for handouts. The actual monastery was an oasis in such a dire surrounding of poverty that lined the streets the mile or so before we reached the sacred grounds. Once inside the monastery, we were greeted by a very gentle and kind monk who gave us a tour. He reminded me of Jeff’s oldest brother Don in his quiet demeanor. When we approached the front of the building Noah did the sign of the cross. A defining moment that sealed the deal of our question of what faith, if any, was he raised in. Once inside the church he stayed by the side of the monk the entire time, asking questions, pointing to things etc. At one point he asked where the stain glass of Jesus was and was very relieved to find it front and center behind the alter. Noah is Christian.and last night he was telling Helen that he lived around the corner from a church in Dessie.

We had to stop and use a bathroom on our way back to Addis. Ayella pulled into a village and got out at a restaurant. (loosely used term: restaurant) We were traveling with another family, Lucy and her young daughter who she had recently adopted as well. Her daughter had to use the bathroom but when Ayella came around to her door to take her, Demamie went crazy. Something about where we were must have triggered a memory of her relinquishment because she screamed blood curdleing terror filled screams. Maybe on the day she was abandoned a man took her away from her mom in the back of a car. Who knows…except the screams she had were like no other I have ever heard. Ayalla shrugged his shoulders and took Musse to the bathroom and left Demamie to scream. When we figured out she thought she was going to be pulled from her mom again, Cindy, Lucy and I were able to piece together the sentence, “Mommy will go with you to the bathroom.” So Lucy, Demamie, and I got out of the car and ventured into the restaurant. When we walked in it was clear that it was no place where women were welcome. In the corner was a black and white tv flickering Aljazzera news while elderly men with their shephard staffs sat watching the going ons on the world. Of course there was no indoor plumbing so we walked past the men to the back door and saw Ayella in the very rear of the property. Musse came out from behind a thatched screen holding his nose, indicating that it was a pretty stinky hole on the other side of the curtain. Lucy led Demamie to the hole and stood watch on the other side. A very sweet older gentleman followed us to the back of the property and for a few moments stared at Lucy and I. He then motioned to her…he sensed her discomfort in the situation and surroundings that she was in. In very sweet broken English he spoke to Lucy…”Do not be scared…I am your brother…you are my sister.” Pretty cool. The men at the restaurant were very curious yet very kind to us. We shook hands when we left and when I got back to the car all I could say and think was, ‘that was SO cool!’ It was, beyond a doubt, the most enriching bathroom break I have or ever will have in my life. : >)

On our way out of Debre Lebanos I became overwhelmed with the contrast of beauty and poverty under the same sky. It can be overwhelming at times. For about 15 minutes I held my head out the window while the fresh Ethiopian mountain air blew on my face. Children tending their herds, women on the side of the streams doing their laundry waved excitedly when we passed. They have so little yet they have so much as they know no better. It was a defining day in my life…one I will never forget.

Ethiopia Day 3 September 21, 2008

2009-02-12T13:09:00.000-08:00

9/21/08

It’s Sunday morning around 6:30 am. Morning prayers are being chanting beyond my window. It is really a peaceful sound rising from this city that seems so restless. Of course the tortured dog next door at times drowns out the prayer but sadly I have become accustom to its periodic pain as well. I’ve learned to ignore it because I have no other choice. I can’t fix the problem and I can’t run from the problem so I must ignore the problem.

Yesterday we had a wonderful day. Mr. Teklu met us @ 9:00. We drove through the city to meet up with Jessica and her little daughter Melat. Teklu’s plan for us today was to drive south of the city to lakes created by volcanos. We had a wonderful lunch overlooking a large lake south of the city. A huge variety of African birds flew around our overlook. Parrots, ravens, storks. Every meal is followed by an offer for coffee. Today we said yes and incense, popcorn, and coffee were served. Musse has love his poloroid camera….it’s been a hit! He knows he is only allowed 10 pictures a day and he is very conscience of his choices of what to take for the day. Yesterday he took a picture of our beautiful waitress at Dreamland Family Resort. Although she was dressed in her waitress outfit and looked very put together I am guessing when she left the gates of the building her life was not as put together. She was SO thrilled when Musse gave her a copy of the picture (much to my selfish sadness because the pic Musse took was beautiful and I would have loved to have kept it) She immediately bent down and kissed Musse on the forehead and tucked her picture in her pocket. It was a prize for her…and she wasn’t going to let it go.

The drive to and from was beautiful if you could cast your eyes to the horizon and ignore the suffering and poverty along the roadsides. You truly never get a break from the despair when making your way around Addis. You turn a corner only to encounter worse suffering then what you were just witness to a minute sooner. I have seen a dead horse carcass rotting at an intersection, I’ve had a man with no legs come to my taxi window begging for a birr (= 10 cents), we’ve had a mother and her 4 children follow us back to the guest house so crazy with hunger and despair that they had a mad laughter rising from their tired souls.

Last night we topped off our day with dinner at Fastika…a restaurant that serves traditional Ethiopian cuisine. The building itself is this beautiful simulation of a grass hut. Inside the ceilings are painting with murals of Ethiopian life. Dinner is served on a giant silver pan resting inside a basket that is similar to the shape of a drum. After dinner we were entertained by tradition music and dance from Ethiopia. It was one of the best evenings I have ever had. Musse stayed back at the guest house with the other children so it was just the parents out on the town. It was a nice break for all of us and really and enjoyable evening all around.

I find it so ironic that through out all of this I sit here this morning on my bed and hear prayers being chanting across the rooftops…the people on the streets do not have anything material to hold onto but they have their God and that is enough to pick themselves up off the side of the road every morning and start their day of despair all over again. Are they happy? I can’t imagine. Are they at peace with their existence? I don’t know. Do the have faith? They must because they are still on our earth. I have come to witness that this situation…this situation of poverty is so big I cannot even begin to imagine how it can be fixed. This is one city in Africa…a city by some standards is said to be progressive. I cannot fix this on a grand scale but I can focus on Musse. I can fix Musse. The rest…I can just pray for them because that is the one thing both they and I share… we both share faith.

Ethiopia Day 2 September 19, 2008

2009-02-12T13:08:00.000-08:00

There was no question in my mind or Musse’s mind that he would be going back to the New Flower guest house with me today. When we pulled up to the WACAP house Cindy tapped my shoulder and said, “Isn’t that him?” I looked out the front window of the van and peering through the window of one of the rooms of the house was a very wide eyed handsome young face. Before we had a chance to unload ourselves from the van Musse was out the door. I had hardly stepped foot on the ground when he ran to me and wrapped his arms around my neck and hugged me…a very tight hug that no one was going to deny him. We hugged and talked for a few minutes and then went into the reception/play room of the WACAP house. Inside the cook was preparing a formal coffee ceremony for us. On the ground were long blades of cut grass. A small stove about the size of a lunch box heated wood to be used to warm the fire. Several small coffee cups, a little larger than a jigger, were set out on a tray. Coffee beans were roasted over the fire while we visited. There are not many children at the house right now…in fact there are only 5 infants. That is changing however as Mr. Teklu has said he is bringing 6 more 4- 8 year olds in to the house this week. We shared our donations with the staff. They were very grateful…they truly were. Cindy brought some donations as well. She brought a hat that had been her mom’s (who passed away a little over a year ago) The hat was kind of like a Gilligan hat with flowers on one side and if you reverse it a solid blue hat would appear. Well, Mr. Musse loved the flower side of the hat and wore it the rest of the day. It was pretty sweet…kind of like the spirit of Cindy’s mom was with her in Africa. The hat certainly made Musse happy.

Pt.II

We are learning, because of the language barrier, that we really don’t know what Mr. Teklu has in store for us from one day to the next. We may think we are doing one thing and then are in a totally different place then what we imagined. The second half of our day was like this. After our morning at the WACAP house he treated us to lunch at a very very nice Italian restaurant. We met up with Jessica, who is another new WACAP mom with a 3 year old daughter. Mr. Teklu said we would be driving to the mountain to see a view of Addis Ababa. The drive up was beautiful…winding our way to the elevation of 10,000 feet through Eucalyptus forests. It was also numbing as this is where I have never in my life seen such poverty and desparation to just live to see another day. What struck me the most was the wood carriers…women with bundles of sticks on their backs that must have weighed in the hundreds of pounds.. Most were barefoot. We must have passed 50-75 of these women on the way up and even more on the way down. The wood is used for fuel…I can’t imagine how much longer the forests surrounding Addis can survive. From what I could see though they were not cutting the trees from the trunks but rather cutting the branches. All the branches were sheared from about 7 feet down to their base. There were times where children were hanging in the trees…and if we as much as gave them a glance and a smile they would jump from the trees and follow our van as far as they could muster the energy to run.

When we reached the top of Mt. Entoto a very soft spoken man met our van. He had very good English and was to be our guide to the viewing point. A worn thatched roof hut and an orange cargo container rested at the peak. We walked through a small meadow where a couple of female goats rested with their kids. It soon became apparent that on this little trek to the top of Ethiopia Cindy would have her own guide and the rest of us would follow picking up the rear. : >) She learned about a cement mixing building that could be seen through binoculars through the trees…she learned about the official indigenous flower of Ethiopia…she learned about the wild animals that roamed the mountainside. We learned how to say, “what was that he said to you?” as most information went straight to her. So we walk back toward the van and were invited into the cargo container which actually turns out to be an art studio of our soft spoken guide. Inside were amazing oil on canvas of Ethiopia through his hands and eyes. There was no way I was leaving without purchasing one…they were too beautiful. So once again he is keeping his eyes on what Cindy is looking at when she stands before a spectacular colored depiction of a lady performing a coffee ceremony but is longingly glancing over her shoulder at something besides her coffee cups. He says to Cindy…the lady in the picture is in love. He’s smooth…really smooth. So then Mr. Teklu tells us that last week when Beyonce was in town for the Millenium celebration she came to the top of Mt. Entoto to view the art of Mr. Wassi Hu. She has asked him to paint a mural for him. It is apparent this is no bohemian artist trying to make a living off of tourist suckers….he’s the real deal who has found his inner soul to create masterpieces on the top of a mountain. So…back to the cargo container…I decide on a painting and Mr. Wassi Hu says he must have one last picture of his painting and motions me into the picture. I joking say, “Well…I’m no Beyonce but I guess I can.” He just says…”no no no…Beyonce beautiful.” Ok…got to agree with him and just shrugged of the possible diss. Next Cindy finally decides on her painting…and it is the woman in love yet trying to perform a coffee ceremony. Once again Mr. Wassi Hu says he must have a picture. Once again I make a Beyonce comment thinking he would repeat how beautiful Beyonce was…but instead he smiles at Cindy and comments on her beauty in comparison to Beyonce. Of course I would not let her live that down…nor the fact that he not only gave her a discount on her painting but also gave her his telephone number AND an offer to show her the town. Ok ok…in all fairness I got a discount too…but to get a phone number not but 24 hours into being in Addis…you go girl.

Ethiopia Day 1 September 19, 2008

2009-02-12T13:07:00.000-08:00

Sounds….9/19/08 7:32 am

For the last hour I have been laying in bed listening to the sounds of my first morning in Africa. Darkness surrounds my room but the world on the other side of my wooden blinds is coming to life. We are not too far from the airport. Now and then the sounds of a helicopter or a turbo prop plane will break the stillness of dawn. In the very far distance I can occasionally hear chanting…. morning prayers of the Muslim faithful. A dog barks. Birds chirp. Cars begin to fill the streets. Horns honk. A baby cries. Something is making a noise I cannot identify…I can’t tell if it is a bird or a child. Quick, short throaty moans…5 short uh uh uh uh uh…the last one rising in pitch. A dog cries…it’s in pain. As quickly as it starts it ends. So I am sitting here..in the darkness…preconceived ideas of how the world will look on the other side of my wooden blinds based on the noises I hear.

The airport is bare bones. Kind of a culture shock from the Amsterdam airport. Got our passports stamped, fought off eager men trying to earn a small tip by assisting (grabbing) our bags, loaded….unloaded…loaded again our luggage as we pushed our way through customs and finally were met by the very friendly face of Mr. Teklu. Phew....but the fun wasn’t over… then we had to make our way out of the airport and into the parking lot filled with more men trying to earn a tip. Lots of men standing around…somewhat ominous in the dark hour we arrived in Addis..

The New Flower is wonderful…and Helen is a very special lady. I anticipate a wonderful stay. I have a small lamp in my room that I use as a night light. Several times in the night it would just go out and maybe an hour or two later come back on. In the corner a tiny cot is set up for Noah Musse.

The dog is crying again. I can tell right now I am going to need to find the strength to tune some things out this week…like Cindy and I said on our final approach…we are moments away from something that will be life changing…whether it is something we like or not we will leave this country changed. I can tell your right now that change is happening….and so now I am going to my window and opening my wooden shutters…and soak in Ethiopia with my eyes as well.